I was just wondering about stereotypes...someone brought it up on the last thread I started, it was about hooters. What military SO stereoypes have you heard of? Have people ever been surprised that you don't fit in, arent what they typically think of a SO?

From what I've heard some people think that wives are lazy, un-kempt, don't work...have as many kids as they possibly can... etc. From my SO experience (which is not long) from what I can tell all the SO's are hard workers-- each in their own way. And I also must say that the women I've met are some of the most compassionate and helpful...friendly..FUN... I don't agree with the stereotypes

:hystericlaugh

anybody else?

Every mil spouse I know is a complete hottie.. :yes All the girls in our FRG are 9s or better, total knockouts..:lol

I think the ones I come across are that they're stupid, ugly, and conservative (not that there's anything wrong with the last part, I just think it's stereotypical to assume all military families are conservative). :dunno I ain't seen no ugly dumb gals on here!

I know, I haven't seen anyone ( especially on SOS) that is ugly. And I must say I've never met any SO's who's whole goal in life is to have as many kids as possible! I mean...why do you think these boys always want to come home so bad... the hot girls waiting for them!! haha

:teehee

Someone said to me a few months back "Why are you with him...you have your own career, two degrees, and can go anywhere you want. You don't need him to take you there." I was like WHAT!?! The woman I was talking to was operating under the stereotype that SO's can't stand on their own two feet and need a 'big strong man' to help them get through life.

Ummm...last I checked every SO I know can stand on their own two feet and then some...this life is no picnic...if I needed 'a big strong man' to 'take care of me' the last place I would be is in a relationship with someone thousands of miles away.

It's funny b/c I read ladies on message boards all the time saying they dont' fit into any military wife stereotype. I think that's bull!

Wikipedia has a great definition on "stereotypes"
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stereotype

they are there for a reason. They are a generalization. For military families I think the generalizations are in many cases the majority. It might not always be good to generalize, but we all do it. There are stereotypes for business people, doctors, lawyers, and even for some neighbhoods in certain areas of a city (probably almost any city in the USA)

i was talking to a friend back home (actually and ex-navy guy/never married) and he was like "uh oh your a navy wife now....all it is..is a bunch of high school drama again..." and i also hear alot of people make the comment your husbands in the navy...you guys are set for life now... i don't know why they would think just cause he's in the navy would make money easier than anyone elses....

omg.. yeah for some reason everyone thinks that we're so rich?! i wish i was?!?!!! it's hilarious that people think that...

The sterotype I hear is uneducated, not interested in furthering yourself or having your own life and identity. I used to be introduced as XX's wife at parties and whatnot when my DH wasn't there. These were people I considered friends and they didn't even introduce me using my first name. It bothered me because he introduced the other two women with me (both AD) by first name. That kind of stuck with me.

I think there are a lot of people who are the stereotypes, but people who are proactive about supporting each other (like here on SOS) are less likely to be the stereotypes.

The other one I hear is that military wives always cheat on their husbands when they're deployed. That really annoys me.

Every negative stereotype I've heard has been disproven by the ladies on this board. (L)

every time a guy finds out i'm a military so... they assume i'm at the bar because i'm trying to cheat.
that's an annoying stereotype! cant i just be a normal bar hopping college student.. that also happens to be happily commited?

The most common ones I have heard are that they are gossippy republican cheaters. None of which I fit so I didn't put much stock in it. :P

Supposedly we all weigh 400 lbs, too, but y'know. :rofl

Supposedly we all weigh 400 lbs, too, but y'know. :rofl

and toothless.

stupid and uneducated, lazy, gossipy, ever reproducing, adulteresses


I've never seen the above.

I think I know a mixture, I know some real hotties, some average and some that really need a makeover (don't want to be mean or rude, but a little makeup and some excercise whouldn't hurt)

That all officer wives are stuck up. I have met some very nice officer wives and I feel very comfortable around them.

We must have life made. And in someways I guess this is true. When my babies get sick I know the dr is free and so is the medicine if I get it on base. But otherwise this life is very hard. And there is not much else "made' about it.

I think I know a mixture, I know some real hotties, some average and some that really need a makeover (don't want to be mean or rude, but a little makeup and some excercise whouldn't hurt)

I've seen that around here, and I couldn't care less about their lack of fashion sense, but the way they act toward me and some of the younger wives is ridiculous.

DH introduces me to his friend, Sgt. WhatsHisName.

Sgt. WhatsHisName: "This is my wife, BlahBlahBlah."

BlahBlahBlah: Pulling her husband closer while eyeballing me.

Me: "Hey, BlahBlahBlah! We're going to the park tomorrow, if you want to meet us there. I'm sure Liam and WhatsHisName Jr. would have a blast!"

BlahBlahBlah: "Honey, we have to go."




That's a stereotype I have found to be true: the wife wearing sweatpants to the social function is probably also wearing insecurity on her sleeve somewhere. Being nice only freaks them out. I don't get it :dunno

I've seen that around here, and I couldn't care less about their lack of fashion sense, but the way they act toward me and some of the younger wives is ridiculous.

DH introduces me to his friend, Sgt. WhatsHisName.

Sgt. WhatsHisName: "This is my wife, BlahBlahBlah."

BlahBlahBlah: Pulling her husband closer while eyeballing me.

Me: "Hey, BlahBlahBlah! We're going to the park tomorrow, if you want to meet us there. I'm sure Liam and WhatsHisName Jr. would have a blast!"

BlahBlahBlah: "Honey, we have to go."




That's a stereotype I have found to be true: the wife wearing sweatpants to the social function is probably also wearing insecurity on her sleeve somewhere. Being nice only freaks them out. I don't get it :dunno

It must be that stereotype about wives sleeping around :giggle

It must be that stereotype about wives sleeping around :giggle

:rofl Maybe they think I'm trying to hit on them, too! :lmao

:rofl Maybe they think I'm trying to hit on them, too! :lmao


That must be it :lol

I love the stereotypes that says we're all "easy" when our men are gone, and also that we're pretty much made of money, have a relatively easy life, and oh, and of course, we sit around and eat bon bons while our children run around and our husbands work all day to come home to a dirty house. On the other side, I've also heard that we all have OCD's and our houses are always immac5ulate while the men are home, and they always have hot meals and our children are perfect. At least, we should be....

Those ones always make me giggle! :anchor

I can tell you after growing up as a military dependent, being in the military and now nearly 16 yrs as a Navy wife, stereotypes have changed a lot and gotten MUCH, MUCH better than they used to be.
When I was a kid a big stereotype was that enlisted military wives were uneducated and baby machines. That was true to some extent, because the wives of enlisted men tended to be less educated than officers wives. The Army specifically had a high rate of wives who were lacking a high school diploma and also had the least education among enlisted men. That has changed a LOT in the last 40 yrs or so. A large number of wives I meet now have some college, if not a Bachelor's Degree. The same goes for the Enlisted Member themselves. They are much higher educated than years ago.
Another stereotype that I have run across is that military spouses are there just to milk the government. Heck, I know too many that don't use the priviledges they have - such as the commissary and exchange and hospital, because they said, "It is my spouse in the military, not me, so why should I use it?"
Finally another stereotype I hear alot of is the "West Pac Widow" syndrom. Guy goes out on cruise and wife immediately goes out and parties and picks up guys at the club. This was real prevailant in Pearly Harbor and I am sure just as common in other big ports such as San Deigo. It does happen, but I think there are far, far less people that do it than is thought of doing it.

The only sterotypes Ive really heard were that all military spouses are unfaithful, dirty and cheaters and that there easy.......

I've heard many stereotypes. That wives are lazy, don't work, pop out kid after kid (because apparently we get more money for each kid), the belief that when the ship is away the wife will play, etc. Thankfully though I have only had one run in with one of those stereotypes. And it wasn't meant out of malice, she just didn't know. My hubby's grandma thought we got paid more for each kid. We were talking about expenses and she brought it up. She was very surprised to learn we don't.

Now, I don't work and we have 3 kids but I don't work cause I'm lazy and we don't have 3 kids because we want to pop out as many kids as possible. I stay at home because we frankly can't afford to pay for day care for 2 kids full time and part time for 1. Plus, we both agree that we would rather I stay home right now. And if I wanted to pop out as many kids as possible I wouldn't have been on BC for close to 3 years of him being in the military since we have been married (which is just about half the time he has been in since we have been married). I also have my AA and then some in credits. I'll be going back at our next duty station to finish my bachelor's and possibly get my master's.

I have actually gotten responses of gratitude and amazement. When I tell people I'm a military wife they tell me stories of when their hubby was in, how they couldn't deal with the seperations and deployments and ask how I do it, say how they support the troops, etc. Whenever I'm at the Nex, Commi. or on base and AD/Retired guys see me (this has happened a couple times with ladies, too, but I happen to run into more AD/Retired guys than girls) with the kids they always go out of their way to help me. They open doors, ask if I need help, let me go first, etc.

The one I've heard that I can't stand is that all Navy wives are overweight and lazy and I'm not one of those Navy wives. I've also heard that they are all cheaters, have tons of kids, don't work and so on and so on.

The one I continually hear is that they have no civillian friends/are "too good" to hang out with civilians. Yeah...sure...riiiight.

I even get asked if I only hang out with other military so's...yeah, like I'm going to ditch all of my good friends just because DB is in the Army.

I've seen that around here, and I couldn't care less about their lack of fashion sense, but the way they act toward me and some of the younger wives is ridiculous.

DH introduces me to his friend, Sgt. WhatsHisName.

Sgt. WhatsHisName: "This is my wife, BlahBlahBlah."

BlahBlahBlah: Pulling her husband closer while eyeballing me.

Me: "Hey, BlahBlahBlah! We're going to the park tomorrow, if you want to meet us there. I'm sure Liam and WhatsHisName Jr. would have a blast!"

BlahBlahBlah: "Honey, we have to go."




That's a stereotype I have found to be true: the wife wearing sweatpants to the social function is probably also wearing insecurity on her sleeve somewhere. Being nice only freaks them out. I don't get it :dunno

I hate how the ranks get transferred over to the sos.That HAPPENS alot.So the Officers looooove to point out to my DB all their "wisdom" on relationships,and dating a girl so close to __________. Not ALL women are cheating skanks...but unfortunately,none of DB's Officers seem to offer any words of encouragement for having a gf so close to _________. Thanks,guys :mumble

How bout gfs being treated like we're not even significant to be discussed with?

I havent felt that here (well if i have I point it out...just because I dont have a wedding band doesnt mean I dont ever deal with his parents or family,or have to sort out bills...I help him with bills too...we act like were married already,its scary) but Ive felt that in person with meeting other military SOs.

I could give two shits what branch you are.Every branch thinks theyre better than the rest,we all know this...get over it.We're all in this together,we all have SOs sign their name on a dotted line and take an oath to defend our country.

:sigh

I hate how the ranks get transferred over to the sos.That HAPPENS alot.So the Officers looooove to point out to my DB all their "wisdom" on relationships,and dating a girl so close to __________. Not ALL women are cheating skanks...but unfortunately,none of DB's Officers seem to offer any words of encouragement for having a gf so close to _________. Thanks,guys :mumble

How bout gfs being treated like we're not even significant to be discussed with?

I havent felt that here (well if i have I point it out...just because I dont have a wedding band doesnt mean I dont ever deal with his parents or family,or have to sort out bills...I help him with bills too...we act like were married already,its scary) but Ive felt that in person with meeting other military SOs.

I could give two shits what branch you are.Every branch thinks theyre better than the rest,we all know this...get over it.We're all in this together,we all have SOs sign their name on a dotted line and take an oath to defend our country.

:sigh


I agree with you. I can't care less officer or enlisted... it's all bs to me, I dont think it makes it any easier/harder on how "high up or important" your SO is... it's so hard for everyone!

I've had women talk down to me...well actually NOT talk to me at all and be completely rude at this so called picnic... I was really new and didn't know it was because their SO's were more "important" than mine....:dunno Im ok with it now but it really hurt my feelings at the time.

Ah yes...the fat lazy women sitting around eating bon bons watching soaps all day and screaming at their kids.

:giggle

Whatever.

There are many women with many positive traits, and many women with many negative traits. They tend to congregate together (birds of a feather you know). Sooooo...I suppose if you're unlucky enough to be exposed to the white-trash-bon-bon-eating-screaming-at-the-kids-don't-miss-days-oltl-y&r-and-gh, then I can see how the stereotypes might seem more real to you. Otherwise, we're normal women that love our husbands, love our families, and are willing to work a little harder then the average jane to see to it that said families succeed and grow stronger together. Or apart. Whichever the moment may call for.

Stereotypes...well I've heard we stay home, make babies, and spend our husbands money :lol I was like wtf when I heard that one :lol

Stereotypes...well I've heard we stay home, make babies, and spend our husbands money :lol I was like wtf when I heard that one :lol

what money???

thats what i always say :giggle

I've had women talk down to me...well actually NOT talk to me at all and be completely rude at this so called picnic... I was really new and didn't know it was because their SO's were more "important" than mine....:dunno Im ok with it now but it really hurt my feelings at the time.

Yeah DB isnt into all the big Navy bonding bs so I'm prolly not going to any balls or any bs social affairs where I have to lie and smile the whole time Im there.

Like as long as you know this crap will happen going into it you'll be fine I think.Youve already experienced it and know this is what may happen.It sucks women can be such catty and such "that way." I try to treat people nice until they give me reason otherwise.Then its on...hahaha.

:shrug

what money???

thats what i always say :giggle

SERIOUSLY!! :lol :lol
No one can ever say we married these guys for money....:giggle

I hear a lot that we are fat, lazy women who do nothing but have children so that the military will pay are SO more. Well, first, how comes he's making the same as his counterpart w/ no children if that's true? And, I don't think I'm fat or lazy. I'm busy almost all the time!

no kidding the whole military gals are easy lol funny story my mom went to pick up a drunk friend at a bar one night and was told by some guy that since my dad was away hed show her a good time since thats what she was out looking for...mind you she was 9 months pregnant with me! come on:S

i have heard a lot of stereotypes. but i think it sucks that people will stereotype us like that. i mean we are just like evryone else...

ashley5 -I could give two shits what branch you are.Every branch thinks theyre better than the rest,we all know this...get over it.We're all in this together,we all have SOs sign their name on a dotted line and take an oath to defend our country.

i completely agree!!!!
ive had women talk to me like i was stupid bcuz i dont understand a lot of things(not here) because im still kinda new to this. or because they think that im stuck up.
i dont like anyone judging anyone. Especially if they dont know them..
kno one knows what its like being a military SO unless they are one or have been one.
other than that screw stereotypes.

I know this was posted a few days back...I am catching up.

I was confused a few years back. Another military spouse told me there is a difference in a spouse and wife...and military wives are bad. With no explaination. Whatever, I am his wife.

Another comment to me was - "YOUR A SEABEE SPOUSE?" They were in shock...I though, WTF is this? They said, we would have never guessed your so nice. Whats that about?

The sterotype I hear is uneducated, not interested in furthering yourself or having your own life and identity. I used to be introduced as XX's wife at parties and whatnot when my DH wasn't there. These were people I considered friends and they didn't even introduce me using my first name. It bothered me because he introduced the other two women with me (both AD) by first name. That kind of stuck with me.

I think there are a lot of people who are the stereotypes, but people who are proactive about supporting each other (like here on SOS) are less likely to be the stereotypes.

The other one I hear is that military wives always cheat on their husbands when they're deployed. That really annoys me.

The uneducated thing really pisses me off! I might not be working but I have 2 freaking degrees!!!! Sociology and Music! I hate the stereotype of being rich as well. I am having a hard time just paying basic bills on what the Army pays us!

The cheating rumor isn't hardly a sterotype. I DOES happen, more frequently than people would like to believe. It works both ways too, "what happens on a deployment stays on a deployment." Not to freak anyone out, but it happens. But cheating obviously isn't isolated to just military, it happens anywhere at anytime. :dunno

The cheating is about the only thing I've heard from people not affiliated with the military.

and toothless.

stupid and uneducated, lazy, gossipy, ever reproducing, adulteresses


I've never seen the above.

*Raises Hand*

I have. Well....I think she might have had teeth.

But that was only on one occasion. Her husband worked with my husband.

I remember looking at her in her pink jacket as she walked down the street thinking......."MAN.....that's a LOT of pink!"

SERIOUSLY!! :lol :lol
No one can ever say we married these guys for money....:giggle

LOL so true... I honestly believe behind every strong successful man is a strong successful woman.

We are the ones that keep things going, so we are not weak and need a strong man. I don't think people hear the positive things about us wives. I have only met wonderful, strong, educated, women who have goals for them selves. The only difference is we chose this life to help support our men in the demanding jobs they have. :yes

LOL ... I don't know what other's think of as 'stereotypes' .. but I often hear "i'm surprised that you don't fit into the "stereotype"."

???

The only one I've heard is that military wives do nothing but :blabla.

I, for one, definitely do not live up to that stereocrap.

ashley5 -I could give two shits what branch you are.Every branch thinks theyre better than the rest,we all know this...get over it.We're all in this together,we all have SOs sign their name on a dotted line and take an oath to defend our country.

Hey I know this is old but I didn't see it til just now... WTH? I never said anything about one branch being better than the other. ACTUALLY I just had a post the other day about that cause my MIL was pissing me off--thinking that her son is the only person in the military it seems. I don't know what your problem is but I think your a little harsh. So maybe you should check your facts before you go off like this on people...
thanks
:screwy

sorry double post

i was talking to a friend back home (actually and ex-navy guy/never married) and he was like "uh oh your a navy wife now....all it is..is a bunch of high school drama again..." and i also hear alot of people make the comment your husbands in the navy...you guys are set for life now... i don't know why they would think just cause he's in the navy would make money easier than anyone elses....

I have news for the person who said you are set for life making military money. I make more than my honey does who is a chief. :ohsnap

Hey I know this is old but I didn't see it til just now... WTH? I never said anything about one branch being better than the other. ACTUALLY I just had a post the other day about that cause my MIL was pissing me off--thinking that her son is the only person in the military it seems. I don't know what your problem is but I think your a little harsh. So maybe you should check your facts before you go off like this on people...
thanks
:screwy

I think she was quoting the person that said that, riffrandallxo, thinking it was you. :lol She was saying she agreed with that statement, but instead of using quotes, she just put the name before it, but mixed the names up.

Over the 15+ years as a Navy wife, I've heard all kinds of perceptions of the typical Navy wife.....and I've seen and known a variety of wives. Some would definitely fit the different stereotypes I've heard, but most of them don't.

I have grown up as a military "Bat" and the ideas have changed a lot over the years on stereotypes. I.e. Over the years it has been said that the enlisted wives were uneducated and that the officer wives were all college educated and from well-to-do families. Also that military wives were baby making machines, WestPac Widows, and that all military people were broke and on food stamps all the time.
Well, suffice it to say, those labels have changed. I know more and more "Enlisted" wives who are college educated and can manage money just fine.

if we were anything like that we wouldnt last through a deployment without them!!!!!! So stupid!! Oh well dont pay attention to idiots thats all i can say:giggle

I've heard all these sterotypes.. then I heard one from this girl that said "The wives wear high end fashion with well done hair". I wanted to straight out tell her that the money isnt that good.. and what you think isn't really what goes on.

I live around AFB and Nap Town.. so I try and keep my mouth shut about dating a Army guy. Last time I didnt I this girl started bashing the army... and I just stood there dumfounded. To me I dont care. Our men fight the same war.. they all watch eachothers backs no matter if they are Air Force, Navy, Army or Marines!

Hmm, probably that we are all sit on our couches all day and eat bon-bons all day long. While we have babies all the time because we get paid to do so. Oh and that we all cheat on our husbands because we are all whores.

Someone needs to come up to me and say any of that so I can slap them in the face! :lol

I think she was quoting the person that said that, riffrandallxo, thinking it was you. :lol She was saying she agreed with that statement, but instead of using quotes, she just put the name before it, but mixed the names up.

hahaha omg

:hystericlaugh

sorry, my bad