I hadn't heard from my db for over 3 weeks until he called me last week. I was becoming very worried about him and insecure thinking it must be me why he hasn't called or thinking the worse. It got to the point where i wrote him a motomail that "hurt him". Turns out he was on a mission for 3 weeks and couldn't call, get mail, or motomail.

How do you ladies stay so strong and do not get insecure when it comes to not hearing from him and what's going on? That was my first time experiencing that and is my first deployment. I feel much better now knowing that there will be times like this. but man... how do you ladies do it?:wow

i had the same thing while ago...i got call once in a while but the letters stopped suddenly..i started to go little nuts and worried a lot...then i told db and i got the best letter, saying that he didnt even realize that he didnt write for such a long time..:duh everyone has their doubts, but if you can...talk to your db that helps :)

honestly...i do it by trying my BEST to think positively...i try to push all those negative thoughts out of my head...which is a really super hard thing to do...thats how i stay strong...i try not to think about it...you can do it!!!

it took me a long time to feel this strong:hugehug

I hadn't heard from my db for over 3 weeks until he called me last week. I was becoming very worried about him and insecure thinking it must be me why he hasn't called or thinking the worse. It got to the point where i wrote him a motomail that "hurt him". Turns out he was on a mission for 3 weeks and couldn't call, get mail, or motomail.

How do you ladies stay so strong and do not get insecure when it comes to not hearing from him and what's going on? That was my first time experiencing that and is my first deployment. I feel much better now knowing that there will be times like this. but man... how do you ladies do it?:wow

Honey it isn't easy. Our first reaction as women is to write those nasty grams we are so good at. The ones that tell him how we feel and that he is a no good so and so for not calling or e-mailing. Been there, done that. My DB left on 11/5/07 and I didn't hear from him over a week. My first reaction was WTF, he is one the damn ship, can't go anywhere what the hell happened. Sent a couple of those nasty grams and found he was busy after deployment, lost his password to the e-mail account and had to track down IT. Damn did I look stupid.

What I do now is type the nasty gram to get it off my chest then erase it. But don't forget DON'T HIT THE SEND KEY..........

JO

I do it becuase I trust him...simple as that. I know if he can call he will call and if I am missing him he is missing me.

It's natural to get insecure. How can you not when you haven't heard from someone you care about in weeks? You just have to keep pushing through and not focus on the "what ifs" and focus on what you know for a fact!

insecurity is the easy way out. having trust and faith is sometimes harder. Really you just have to stop and think about where he is what he is doing. If he is at home not deployed then yeah something is going on, but if he is deployed there are a number of things that can stop communication. Always always stop, take a breath and think before you send something that you can't get back. I have given into my angry side a time or two. only to find out later that email was down or that he could get my emails but not send any out. it's not easy at all, but you do what you gotta do to make it through the day.

Thanks ladies. I'll take it from the best .:hehe

Honey it isn't easy. Our first reaction as women is to write those nasty grams we are so good at. The ones that tell him how we feel and that he is a no good so and so for not calling or e-mailing. Been there, done that. My DB left on 11/5/07 and I didn't hear from him over a week. My first reaction was WTF, he is one the damn ship, can't go anywhere what the hell happened. Sent a couple of those nasty grams and found he was busy after deployment, lost his password to the e-mail account and had to track down IT. Damn did I look stupid.

What I do now is type the nasty gram to get it off my chest then erase it. But don't forget DON'T HIT THE SEND KEY..........

JO

great idea, I will have to start doing that, I have a habit of hitting the send button too much:teehee

Been there before on my first deployment. I think for all the other deployments afterwards that you should let them know exactly how important it is to talk to you but you understand that they are busy and if they are in iraq or something they are trying not to get hurt etc. My boyfriends first deployment I heard from him far and few inbetween, I thought that I was having a love affair with my email account. You just have to be patient and hang in there and know that he is always thinking about you and about coming home and when he is able to he will contact you. But let him know how you feel casually, let him know its important to you that you hear from him etc and let him take it from there. Just try not to be too pushy, you dont want to seem like a nag heh. (been there before)

I have learned a lot over the hmmm well training included its been 8 months apart so far. The biggest thing I have learned is just to ask the question....not to make assumptions. Its hard to do but I am getting better at it "Hey babe I haven't heard from you in a while and I am starting to worry. Is there some reason? Did I do something?" That and "no news it good news" But, I haven't had to go 3 weeks w/o contact. Be strong you can do it!!