Im new to this whole thing. My boyfriend is a US soldier who was stationed out of state in texas while i was here in GA. He currently is in iraq, and has been for about a month, how come this is harder?His deployment is suppose to be 15 months, but it could be longer. No one here seems to understand how i feel, and i want to punch someone everytime i hear a girl say "my bf diidnt call me today ugh" or "i miss him if i dont get to see him over the weekend". I cant wait till he gets mid tour leave, please tell me it gets easier!:tears

It only gets easier if you let it. If you dwell on him being gone you wont get out of your funk. I miss my husband but I am not upset about him being deployed...its his job and its something I knew would happen. I tend not to be upset about things I cant control. I know he doesnt want to be there any more then I want him to be there. Everyone will tell you to stay busy but I say just be doing things that make you feel closer to him and better about yourself. While my DH is gone I am taking this time to better myself so we can have an ever better marriage when he gets home. Hang in there. It will be fine (-8

Finailly someone who says all the things i say to myself...helps to hear it from someone other than me though. Thanks!

Absolutely, better yourself, be strong. Although my husband has been in USMC 9 yrs, this is our first deployment(Iraq) and IT IS tough, but I joined a great gym that has daycare, I'm always working on projects to send DH and I try to be patient. He calls and emails when he can and we just take it one day at a time...easier said than done, beleive me I do know, but hang in there.....

It only gets easier if you let it. If you dwell on him being gone you wont get out of your funk. I miss my husband but I am not upset about him being deployed...its his job and its something I knew would happen. I tend not to be upset about things I cant control. I know he doesnt want to be there any more then I want him to be there. Everyone will tell you to stay busy but I say just be doing things that make you feel closer to him and better about yourself. While my DH is gone I am taking this time to better myself so we can have an ever better marriage when he gets home. Hang in there. It will be fine (-8

:agree
you can't control what people say/do, you can only control how you respond to them. people are always going to say stupid/insensitive/rude things. getting upset over it is only going to make things worse, so just take a deep breath and ignore them.

did he leave from ft hood? my guy left from there about a month ago too. it sucks.

:welcome your in the right place for people who will understand:)

I feel ya...not living near a bunch of people going through the same thing does NOT help us out any! Thats why Im glad I have this forum!!!!

I had to sit on my hands to stop myself from B***h slapping my best friend the other day when she made a rude comment about how much I was texting DB when he was leaving in a few days!!!! its tough when other people just dont get it but we have to look at it that way...that they just dont get it...not that they are purposely being insensitive.

**good thoughts and hugs*** his midtour leave will come before ya know it!!!!

I know how daunting it seems right now, but you can do it! My DH (then fiancee) and I went through our first deployment this year. If you ever need to talk, PM me!

Thank you all!!! I feel like I finally have someone who understands. Being at college, I am the only one there I know who is going through or has gone through a deployment..Dan left in August. It does get easier...but there will be times when it hurts so bad and then times when you feel alright..I have been in a slight funk lately..how do you all deal with swings of being able to talk a lot and then not being able to talk at all for like weeks at a time? Again THANK YOU!!! I have felt kind of alone for a while.

Thank you all!!! I feel like I finally have someone who understands. Being at college, I am the only one there I know who is going through or has gone through a deployment..Dan left in August. It does get easier...but there will be times when it hurts so bad and then times when you feel alright..I have been in a slight funk lately..how do you all deal with swings of being able to talk a lot and then not being able to talk at all for like weeks at a time? Again THANK YOU!!! I have felt kind of alone for a while.

your not alone hun, we are all here for you...i am finishing up my senior year in college and no one here even comes close to understanding what we go through. all the ladies here are amazing and will always lend you an ear or a shoulder when you need it. stay strong! pm me anytime if you need anything

That bothers me too when people talk about not seeing their boyfriends over the weekend. But you have to stop to realize that before you actually had to go through this, you never realized what deployment was all about, and probably never gave it much thought. People don't realize how lucky they really are.
I used to get upset when my boyfriend didn't come home for the weekend when he was stationed in VA and I was in MA. And I think the fact that "he could" and didn't sometimes kind of made it hard. But I know that he's in Iraq and there's no changing that and there's not a single thing I can do about it.
In my opinion, I think it gets easier because you just have to live with it, you have no choice.. But the first 2 weeks were torture for me and it was fine after that! Instead of counting how many days he's been gone, I've been counting down till he takes his leave! I also gave myself some goals... silly goals but they help pass the time! I wanted to lose 10 pounds before he comes home on leave and also pay off my credit card. Somehow it does pass the time to think about it.

I feel the exact same way. It didn't hit me until recently how alone I feel sometimes because my friends just don't get it. Like other people said on here...try not to look at it as the fact that your friends don't care...they just have no idea what you're going through since they haven't been though it themselves. Hopefully sites like this will be able to help you, that's what I'm hoping for myself too :)

wow...this was a post from awhile back...thanks for the support though girls!!! im doing fine now its been almost 3 months....

It only gets easier if you let it. If you dwell on him being gone you wont get out of your funk. I miss my husband but I am not upset about him being deployed...its his job and its something I knew would happen. I tend not to be upset about things I cant control. I know he doesnt want to be there any more then I want him to be there. Everyone will tell you to stay busy but I say just be doing things that make you feel closer to him and better about yourself. While my DH is gone I am taking this time to better myself so we can have an ever better marriage when he gets home. Hang in there. It will be fine (-8

:agree