but my DH is only going to tech school in TX. It is different than deployment to Iraq but I still feel so depressed and upset. We've only been married for 3 months and he'll be leaving in January for twice that long.

Again, i'm sorry if anyone is thinking "this is nothing compared to my situation" but this is the biggest thing we've dealt with thus far. I know it could be worse.

Anyway, I would like to talk about it with my DH, but he hates talking about it. This all turned out because a lot of little things went spectacularly wrong, and through unusual circumstances his orders got changed in big ways really fast. So i know he feels bad for putting me through all that, but he hates talking about it. He just acts like nothings happening.

It is so totally frustrating.:cage

I've read on the boards here that it is common for fighting and people withdrawing and such....but it seems extreme given our situation.

I did manage to get a small conversation out of him. He says he looks at it as part of his job and it is just something he has to do. I understand this. The military comes first. But then I was thinking that sounds like he doesn't mind going. That he doesn't mind leaving me behind.

I don't want to act selfish and tell him how hard this is going to be for me. That isn't what he needs to hear. He's got a lot going on. At the same time, I don't want him to think this is easy for me and life will just be fine without him. At least he has somewhere new surrounding him, a lot of things to keep him busy. He is the type where if he has a goal, that's all he can think about. There isn't nagging thoughts in the back of his brain. I have our apartment where everywhere I look I see his stuff and my brain does nag...a lot....I can be at work in the middle of the busiest day and some part of me will still be thinking "he is gone...."


I guess this post doesn't really have a point to it. Just more or less getting my worried thoughts out. :ohno

Maybe it is just a guy thing and he doesn't want to gush on how he can't imagine that long of time with out me?:smitten LOL.

Just wish i understood him better when it comes to these kinds of things.:sadeyes

My DH acts like it's no big deal to leave, but I know better. I think it's just how he deals with it. To me, being apart is being apart. Yes it is easier when you know that they are not in the thick of the chaos. When DH is gone to school or out on a det it's easier for me compared to when he's over there "in country". Just try and take it one day at a time. Maybe you and he can work out a regular talking time for when he's gone. Once you get into your own routine the time should pass rather quickly. BTW- This is a great time to help you pass the time. ;)

I think that seperation period is hard! I dont care if he is in Iraq 30 miles away or one state over! It all sucks!

It's ok sweetie, DH has been at school since august and won't be done until Feb.... I mean I've had visits and a couple breaks in between, but it is hard no matter what.. Granted I've ALWAYS looked at women that's went through a deployment or even multiple one's as strong STRONG strong women, and I have the utmost respect for them.. It is a different type of absence.. and I know that..a much harder one... But with DH being gone it has made me be a stronger mother and wife.. You will be ok and feel free to IM me just to BS anytime.. :hugehug