dammit! i'm balling my eyes out and he hasnt' even left yet. He has almost a month and every time i'm by myself I end up crying. I don't want to do it in front of him because I know he'll feel bad and there isn't anything he can do. At the same time I feel so alone in this. Not like "i'm the only one this is happening to" but more because I really don't have any friends who understand and i'm lucky i have my family but there again....they've never been in these shoes.

:tears:tears:tears
To make matters worse I just listen to all these romantic songs we've listened to together and they all sound so sad now. It just makes the tears come faster. I try not to but maybe crying is the best thing right now? Or not.

AGH! If i'm like this now....what happens when he does leave?:ohno

It gets better! :hugs

Well...you get better at dealing with it anyhow.

Turn off the songs. But on something upbeat. Do do things that make you think more on it...make the time you have right now the best you can.

i think the months and weeks leading up to deployment (once you get that word that they will be leaving) are the hardest. :hugs

I think waiting for the deployment to start is the worst! I cried sooo much before DB deployed and when it finally came I was able to breathe. I know it's hard right now but it will get better. You could just go ahead and start your countdown. That's what I did and it helped.

You won't feel this bad for the whole time. The anticipation leading up to when he actually leaves is one of the worst parts of the whole situation. Holding everything back from him probably isn't the way to go though, you'll probably end up feeling worse. I think you should discuss how you're feeling, and let him comfort you, because I'm sure that's all he wants to do for you. :hang

i think the months and weeks leading up to deployment (once you get that word that they will be leaving) are the hardest. :hugs
:yes Because once they leave, you can start counting down! :P It does get easier to deal with though... :hugs

I was a wreck right before my hubby left. Everytime i heard a song on the radio or saw anything that reminded me of him, made me cry. When he left for work in the morning i didnt want him to go.... i would sit in bed after he left crying because i was so scared of what was to come. I was so scared, and the last few days were hard. But once he go on that bus and left... it was kind of a relief. I dont know how to explain it. But it was a weight lifted off my shoulders knowing i didnt have to fear saying goodbye for now. Saying goodbye is the hardest.
But after that.... its not counting the days until he leaves.... its counting the days until he is back! Which i like much better!!
Hang in there. I know it is hard, and yet i am still learning... this is my first deployment.
We are all here for you!!

i know how u feel thats how i feel right now and my b/f leaves pretty soon

I have been through 10 patrols with DH. I wish I had some great words of wisdom here. The best I can say is that is really does get better. It is true that the hardest part is before they leave.

Ladies.....Just wait for HOMECOMING!! There is nothing like it in the world! Sometimes I think it is sad that not every couple gets to have a homecoming at least once. The time leading up to him getting home....there just aren't words for it. It is like the day before Christmas, the last day of school, getting a new house, and winning the lottery all wrapped up in your DH or SO.

Just know that the days will go by, and each day is one less until he gets home to you.

It's strange but you will feel better after the :quote saying goodbye :quote part is over. You should definately tell him how you feel and let him see those tears though because while he's away he can't be there to hold you but right now he can, and you'll wish you would've let him comfort you. Hang in there :hugs

i am right there with ya sister, DB leaves in about a month and is in training for most of it - if you want, PM me and we'll get through it together! know that we're all here for you to cry to!

Sweetie, I'm sorry you're having a rough time! Do you still have my number?? (did I give you one with a 210 or 850 area code? The 850 is correct and if you don't have that number, PM me and I will get you the right one if you need to talk or a shoulder to cry on!)

:hugehug

You know alot of what ya all say is true I think the wait leading up to the leaving can be the hardest part and that is where I am at right now he is training and hasnt left yet but still he isnt here gone is gone I say no contact at the moment either so that makes it terribly hard not even hearing his voice thats is so hard but I guess I have to get used to it but being a Marine wife I have to be strong for him to make sure he knows I will be ok no need for him to worry about my crybaby totally lose control of all my emotions breaking down mental state hahahaha cause I am not that strong

he is my world and without him it feels like I cant breathe