hey my name is jessica i am now dating someone who has been a friend of mine for about 5 years. We dated once before but it was through high school and we both started going our own way. Now he is in the Army and I stuck here at home. He has been gone since May. We have been friends for such a long time i thought that we could talk about anything. Well he is graduating on friday and I am making the 11 hour drive to be there for him. We have been talking a lot lately about him going to Italy in Feb. He is so excited and I am so happy for him. He is going to be there are 2 years. I am usually awake for the 4a.m. text message but this morning the message was different. He was telling me how he didn't know if he wanted us to be together while he is gone like to put our relationship on hold for 2 years. I didn't know what to say other than to ask him why is he all of the sudden thinking that way when before it was we were going to take it day by day and we will make it through anything. I am still going to go on friday because I miss him so much but I don't know what to do. I kind of think that he is just scared and doesn't want us to be so far away but I don't think that he gets that I want to be with him no matter what. I am willing to wait the 2 years and he knows I would do anything for him. It just hurts so bad having him tell me he doesn't know and thinks it would be better if we just stay in touch. Please I need some advice! This is getting so hard for me to handle.

:hugs it's gonna take alot of work to do that kind of a long distance relationship for 2 years. you guys need to talk alot about that kind of commitment. it's pretty huge. :bigsadhug i hope it works out

Well, the guys in the army all think that way. In his mind, he probably thinks there is no way you would wait for him for 2 years, and the way he sees it is that he doesn't want to get hurt if he finds out you found someone else or cheated or something...not saying you would but they all think that. He would rather end it now before you both get hurt. Just tell him exactly what you typed out. Say you would wait for him no matter what. Just remember they are all scared of getting hurt and they like to distance themselves from the ones they love.

I wish you luck!

Well, the guys in the army all think that way. In his mind, he probably thinks there is no way you would wait for him for 2 years, and the way he sees it is that he doesn't want to get hurt if he finds out you found someone else or cheated or something...not saying you would but they all think that. He would rather end it now before you both get hurt. Just tell him exactly what you typed out. Say you would wait for him no matter what. Just remember they are all scared of getting hurt and they like to distance themselves from the ones they love.

I wish you luck!


i agree!!!! Everyone is afraid of getting hurt the women as well as the men, so just be there for him...tell him how much to care how much you want this and then also show him. even if you think yur doing something simple...sometimes its the little things that mean the most