So my Coastie calls me today, I haven't heard from him in weeks while he's underway. I'm thrilled, jumping up and down as my phone rings...the first thing I hear is bad news. He's going to Bahrain for at least a year starting in May, and following that will most likely continue to being stationed in California, where he'd be underway for nine months out of a year. I'm an east coast girl, it's where I live and go to college, and we're only nineteen and twenty years old. We've been dating for a year and it's beyond wonderful, I love him with every bit of my heart, but he seems to think that the best thing for both of us would be to part ways. If we're so young, how can we spend the next few years separated and still know that we'll be able to be together and get married in the future?

I don't ever want to give up on him, on the relationship that we have because it feels so right. I just don't know if we're mature enough to go through what's coming. But I know I'd want to be with him when he got back, and how would that be if we'd been separated for so long? I know I could remain faithful to him if I sent my mind to it, but I'd be just miserable. It could really be awful if we spent all that time emotionally invested in one another, and then things didn't work out in the end.

Basically, I need advice. I know it's hard to give since you don't know me personally. I just don't want to let him go. :no

tell him....tell him all those things he needs to hear it he needs to be reassured your going to be there my exdb and i (we broke up for other reasons not concerning deployment so dont worry!) did the same thign when he was thinking about signing up to deploy i sat down and told him to shutup and listen to me that im going to be here loving you and thinking of you ever second i get whether ur here or there so it doesnt matter to me where you are im gonna love you jsut the same...he cried:) said he needed to hear that ...SO my advice tell him all those things your thinking about:)

I also think its important for the two of you to express your feelins to each other in every way...not just about breaing up but about all of this. Lady had it right when she told you to tell him all of that. I also think you shouldnt give up hope. It can work if you 2 are on the same page. I am only 20. I was married when I was 19. y husband is in Iraq and deffinitly worth the wait. Your situation is deffinitly different like everyones is but just wanted to put it out there that it is possible. Good Luck

Just follow your (L) it could take you anywhere!

Thanks for the encouraging words...its very difficult for us to really know what our relationship could turn out to be, because our whole relationship has been long-distance and a struggle to be together. And we thought it was going to be getting better soon. So now it might be time for us to let ourselves see what other options are out there. I think if we're meant to be together, we will be...and we do have months to talk and figure out how we feel. He'll certainly never be far from my heart, no matter what happens.

follow your heart and tell him EVERYTHING you are feeling, and remember that's what meant to be, will be.

I would talk to him about it and how you feel.

yeah i cant wait to talk to him about it, we all know how frustrating it can be when you need to talk about something but SOMEBODY is underway so theres no cellphone service and minimal emailing, haha! maybe it's a good thing that i'll have time to collect my thoughts before we talk again!