dh is deploying next month and we JUST moved up here to Washington...as in we moved into our apartment a week ago. We're leaving for Houston for Christmas tomorrow and coming back in the beginning of January. We'll be here for about two weeks before he leaves. I assumed I would just go back home to Houston when he got deployed. Some idiot at his brigade tried to tell him that if I left the apartment, he would no longer get his BAH. It says otherwise on all the paperwork he brought home, but it'll still be a big pain in the ass to put all our stuff back in storage and still lose 2 months rent and the apartment, so that we'll have to go aparment hunting all over again as soon as he gets back. apparently, the army thinks i should stay here and join FRG and get a job and blah blah blah. i don't know anyone here. we just got here. i dont have a job yet. i'm a slow friend maker. :lol i hate cold. i hate rain. it's the middle of winter and rains all the damn time! i've never lived by myself before. i dont want to. i don't like being alone for even one night. if dh has to go somewhere overnight, or a few days, or a week or whatever with the army, i make someone come stay with me so i dont have to sleep alone. :lol on the other hand, i don't like staying at my parents' without dh for long periods of time, and that's what i would be doing to save money. but at least i wouldn't be alone, and i would have my family there to support me emotionally.

should i just suck it up and stay here by myself to avoid the hassle of moving stuff all over again, having to look for another apartment, and because the army wants me to?? we had both been planning that i'd go home when he got deployed, and now they've convinced dh that it would be better if i stay here. what do you think i should do?

sorry it's so long. thanks for your help in advance guys!

I moved back home and I am so thankful that I did! We also put all of our stuff in storage...You will still recieve your BAH and when you get out of your lease you dont pay anything except the finishing of that months rent. Its called the sldier sailor act and it says that when showing orders they must let you out of your lease free of charge you just have to show orders and give them a 30 days notice. Although it was a pain in the butt to put all of our things in storage I am like I said glad I moved home. My parents support me alot and I know if I would have stayed in our apartment I would have been really lonely! Plus its a great way to save money...good luck

If you can handle living with your family for that long, and you don't like being alone, I say go for it. I wish my mom and I got along better, I'd so move home right now and save money off of BAH. :teehee

Thanks. That's what I've been leaning towards, dh just made me question my decision and got me all confused! and I need to decide like...right now. :lol

I hate it when DH makes me make a decision on the spot. I never know what to pick:dunno, and then after I'm like :duh it should have been the other one! :teehee

Good luck though, on whichever you choose. ;)

yeah, exactly! :lol

Thanks!

From your post, it defintly sounds your leaning towards moving back and I think that is a great idea and think of all the money you could save off BAH, it would be so worth it!

I agree, you can get out of your lease, just show orders.
Good luck in your decision. I know what its like to be alone and not near family or even friends.. I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy.:no

If you really dont think you can make it the 5 or 6 months alone then move back home but do whats right for you. I probably would stay instead of going home though.You are going to have to learn how to stay alone sooner or later since thats what happens in the army way of life.

My DH was deployed 4mons. and I stayed at our house for half the time and then went home for half the time. Being here by myself gave me a sense of strength, but it was nice being home too though.

i have been trying to think about what to do on this too. we just moved here from oregon, and it is so expensive to move. the idea of putting stuff in storage appeals to me, but with two kids it gets complicated. and for me, living with family isnt an option. best of luck to you on your decision.

dh is deploying next month and we JUST moved up here to Washington...as in we moved into our apartment a week ago. We're leaving for Houston for Christmas tomorrow and coming back in the beginning of January. We'll be here for about two weeks before he leaves. I assumed I would just go back home to Houston when he got deployed. Some idiot at his brigade tried to tell him that if I left the apartment, he would no longer get his BAH. It says otherwise on all the paperwork he brought home, but it'll still be a big pain in the ass to put all our stuff back in storage and still lose 2 months rent and the apartment, so that we'll have to go aparment hunting all over again as soon as he gets back. apparently, the army thinks i should stay here and join FRG and get a job and blah blah blah. i don't know anyone here. we just got here. i dont have a job yet. i'm a slow friend maker. :lol i hate cold. i hate rain. it's the middle of winter and rains all the damn time! i've never lived by myself before. i dont want to. i don't like being alone for even one night. if dh has to go somewhere overnight, or a few days, or a week or whatever with the army, i make someone come stay with me so i dont have to sleep alone. :lol on the other hand, i don't like staying at my parents' without dh for long periods of time, and that's what i would be doing to save money. but at least i wouldn't be alone, and i would have my family there to support me emotionally.

should i just suck it up and stay here by myself to avoid the hassle of moving stuff all over again, having to look for another apartment, and because the army wants me to?? we had both been planning that i'd go home when he got deployed, and now they've convinced dh that it would be better if i stay here. what do you think i should do?

sorry it's so long. thanks for your help in advance guys!

haha....we could swap place lol you are about 3 hours away from my family, and i am about 3 or 4 from yours lol

Have you decided, yet? If you know nobody yet, getting a job would actually be a GREAT way to make friends. :yes

I prefer my staying in my own home. My kids are older so I think to keep living the way we do when he is gone is the best for us. Everyone is different so I guess it just depends.

I moved back home and I am so thankful that I did! We also put all of our stuff in storage...You will still recieve your BAH and when you get out of your lease you dont pay anything except the finishing of that months rent. Its called the sldier sailor act and it says that when showing orders they must let you out of your lease free of charge you just have to show orders and give them a 30 days notice. Although it was a pain in the butt to put all of our things in storage I am like I said glad I moved home. My parents support me alot and I know if I would have stayed in our apartment I would have been really lonely! Plus its a great way to save money...good luck
in response to the bolded statement. not true your lease MUST STATE the clause otherwise you can't get out of it. especially if there is other state law in place. A lady here on the board had a huge hassle with her landlord over it just this past summer. I always make sure my lease state that I can get out of my lease with no cost for certain reasons. And if you are going to be going home for a deployment then those words must be in there, otherwise it doesn't apply.

did you decide yet? i went home for 4 mons (5mon deployment for us) and it was awful! While it made the time pass quickly and i had help with my son- the fighting with my stepdad etc just wasnt really worth it and i am MUCH happier being home! We kept our apt though and just paid the bills. We managed to save quite a bit as well :-) Good luck with whatever you decide!

We are able to get out of the lease, and I have decided to go back home to Houston. Houston IS home for me, and I don't know anyone here yet, or have a job. IF I already had a job, or some close friends, I might have stayed. But I don't, so I don't want to be stuck here miserable and alone. I get along with my family for the most part, and I can go stay with DH's parents if I can't handle being with mine anymore. :lol We also don't have any kids yet, so it's a lot easier for me to move just myself and stuff around.

They're telling DH now that he's leaving like a week and a half later than originally planned, and then today he said they might move it up again. MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MINDS! :D

haha....we could swap place lol you are about 3 hours away from my family, and i am about 3 or 4 from yours lol


Ha. Yeah we could! Is your SO deployed as well?

I'm going to try and stick it out here at our place, rather than go home.. but it's nice to have that option if things ever get bad...

If you really dont think you can make it the 5 or 6 months alone then move back home but do whats right for you. I probably would stay instead of going home though.You are going to have to learn how to stay alone sooner or later since thats what happens in the army way of life.

:agree...i plan to stay when DF deploys again...then again, i've lived on my own for a while before getting married...

do what is right for you...but you might be surprised by how well you can do on your own two feet! :goodluck

I am much happier all alone than living with family. I tried a little bit of living with family this deployment and I would rather be alone!

im facin somethin simliar this summer and Im takin my kids and we are goin home so we can be around family. Im up here in WA too and I dont have a support system here. Also when my dh graduates the school he's goin to we will be moving anyways to another duty station.

I prefer my staying in my own home. My kids are older so I think to keep living the way we do when he is gone is the best for us. Everyone is different so I guess it just depends.

I'm like that too! I'll visit my parents for a month at a time TOPS. Staying with them from April until July, 07 I was SOOOOOOOOOOO ready to have my own place, but the time June rolled around!!!!!!

I'm like that too! I'll visit my parents for a month at a time TOPS. Staying with them from April until July, 07 I was SOOOOOOOOOOO ready to have my own place, but the time June rolled around!!!!!!

Same here! I know I can go visit my parents anytime I want while my husband is deployed as long as I'm not in school, but a month at a time is too much for me!!

Personally, I would stay home...but that's because I wouldn't want to move everything into storage and I don't mind time by myself. My parents also live all of 15 minutes away from us so it's no problem for them to come over or for me to stay the night sometime when hubby is away. I think you should do whatever makes you feel the most comfortable though. You're the one that would be alone for several months and dh has to understand what you need.