My hubby is leaving for deployment a month after baby is born. im going crazy not knowing if i will me able to handle a 3yr old and a new baby. anyone else go through this?

Deja vu post...lol!

i'll be right there with ya hun...except Matt probably wont meet this baby till they get back :o( ..We'll just have to be there for eachother!!! It'll be tough but we can do it!!!!

aww im sorry hun :o( It will def. make the days fly by though- thats one good thing!

You can handle it!

When my daughter was born I had my 2 boys who were each a few months shy of 2 and 4 years old when she was born. Dh was deployed, he didn't come home until she was 3 months old. We lived no where near family (never have). I managed, we all do! ;)

Good luck!

Deja vu post...lol!

I was thinking the same thing when I read it lol

I will be going through the same thing...my DH might not even get to see the birth of his little girl and won't meet her until she is 8 or so months old! And its just going to be me...and some help from my mother too..but still I know how you feel...

Thank you all so much.

Don't worry as long as you got internet...we all got people we can go too!

It'll be rough at first but in the end you'll amaze even yourself. I had a 3 year old and a 1 week old when my dh left for the first time and my mom left that same day too. I was recovering from a c-section and Morgie (the baby) was in and out of the hospital. You can do it!

alright girlies, I dont have children BUT I was visiting DH while he had staff duty the other day. He had gone upstairs and in walked this lady (not much older then 25) with two boys running and screaming and a third in a carrier. He DH is deployed. I know you ladies can handle it. You just have to put your mind to it.

My husband may or may not be here for our baby's birth and then he'll be deployed... so I'll be stuck taking care of a newborn and a 2 year old by myself. What's helping me get through this is knowing that I will be VERY busy with my girls... it's going to be tough that's for sure, but luckily by staying so busy it'll help the time fly. I remember with my first baby, those first few months flew by, actually by the time she turned a year old I couldn't believe a year had passed. You can do this, stay strong for your, your dh and especially your kids. Good luck, feel free to pm me anytime since we'll be in a similar situation.

awww im sorry honny. I am sure you can handle it! You are a very strong woman! Have lots of confidence in yourself!

i will be here pregers still but i will be here for u i know what u mean about taking care of a three year old and a new born we can learn together though ok so no worries

My hubby is leaving for deployment a month after baby is born. im going crazy not knowing if i will me able to handle a 3yr old and a new baby. anyone else go through this?

I know how you feel exactly...myhubby left to Iraq when my son was 3 and my baby was 2 months..its hard...but i'm sure you'll do okay...

My Due date was May 14, and my DH was due to deploy May 19, THEN, two months before they said he "might" deploy May 9, so I was FREAKING out the whole time! This was my first baby, and I didn't want to be alone, so we op't for me to move back to my parent's house for the six months. I was able to spend time with my family, and they were able to spend time with my son. In the end, my DH ended up deploying May 19, and I went in Labor April 30, so my DH was able to spend 19 days with our son.

:hugs My sis is going thru this at the moment, except her DH isn't military. She is in Australia and due anyday, her DH arrives on Friday and he has to go back to Korea on the 9th Feb and she will be in Australia till some time in March or April depending on how long it take to get the birth registration and passport thru.

my baby is 9 months and my hubby hasnt been with him for a 1 month total

awww :hugs You'll be great!

honestly you'll be so busy it will probably make the deployment go faster. start looking now for playgroups/preschool something for the 3 year old and keep yourself busy!

:agree i think keeping busy is the best way to have deployment go faster...I'm looking for a job b/c i stay home with my baby and days are so long sometimes

Wow! I'm in the same boat. Somehow, when it's happening to you, it seems like you're the only one. I hate that our DH's will either miss the births of our babies or leave right after, but it helps knowing I'm not the only one. I'm so worried that DH will not bond with our baby because he deploys right after the birth, but I know he's not that kind of guy. We have a busy year ahead of us, but a new baby will make it fly by, right? Right??!!!

ladies i have a quick question any of your SO's worried about coming back from deployment and are scared the babies they left behind won't recognize him and won't want to be with them?...my DF always says that he's afraid that our son wont' want to be with him...he's gonna be 1 1/2 by then and he left when he was 4 months after his rnr but he was 2 months exactly when the unit deployed for the first time

Yea my husband just deployed leaving me with our two one month old preemies (both of which are two months premature). You will be fine. Take it one bottle feeding and diaper change at a time

My hubby is leaving for deployment a month after baby is born. im going crazy not knowing if i will me able to handle a 3yr old and a new baby. anyone else go through this?

I am, but with teenagers! LOL.....seriously though...things you can do is to try to keep the 3 yr old active. Playgroups, outings, etc. I am assuming since you are at Lemoore (Same as me!) that he is going on a ship deployment? There is a program on the ship where they can make a dvd recording of themselves reading books, which is wonderful for kids that young. If you can do a couple before he leaves as well, that would also be wonderful. Something that has audio and visual aspects of your DH for kids that little, so hopefully they won't shy away from him when he returns and the baby will recognize his voice.
Are you friendly with any of the other spouses in your DH's command? Make it a point to go to the pre-deployment brief as well, because they will have a lot of good information. Be sure your DH gets into PSD as soon as the baby is born to get it on DEERS as well. I would spend a couple of weeks, just going through everything to make sure all the legal stuff is in order so that you have less to worry about and can totally focus on your kids.
Also, don't forget to try to take some time for yourself. I work fulltime, the kids keep me busy, and the house keeps me busy. But I try to make a little time for myself once a week - whether it is the gym or a movie (Free on base) or just reading in a quiet spot. If you eventually need babysitters, the PPV housing office keeps a list of Red Cross Certified babysitters.

My hubby is leaving for deployment a month after baby is born. im going crazy not knowing if i will me able to handle a 3yr old and a new baby. anyone else go through this?

I did it. My oldest was just shy of 3, middle one was 18 months and my youngest was 2 months old when my DH left for a 6 month deployment. I didn't know anyone where we were because we had just come back to the area post Hurricane Katrina. A lot of people we knew before the storm never came back.

It was hard. Just take everything one day at a time. Pick and choose your battles and remember, what doesn't get done one day will be there another day.

:hugs Good luck. PM if you need to talk.

dh is due to leave just one week after my due date. I have 3 other kids to take care of, and no friends or family here. This is also our first REAL deployment, our other one was only 3 months.... this one is much much longer! I am terrified, but I am sure I will deal just fine. I will be so busy watching the new one grow it should go by pretty quickly. Thats what I'm hoping!

I'm right there with ya hun. I have a son who will be almost 22 months old when this little girl is born. Hubby will be in AIT at the other end of the country and is going to miss her birth. He won't be home until she is about 2 months old. If you ever need a friend, I'm here!!:hugs

I am home with out 17 month old... and some days are really tough, but it becomes a way of life! You just get used to it. Just think... when he does get back, you'll have him helping so much that you won't know what to do with yoursef!!! And good thing the baby will be brand new so you won't have too much explaining to do, maybe just to the 3 year old. Hang in there!

My hubby is leaving for deployment a month after baby is born. im going crazy not knowing if i will me able to handle a 3yr old and a new baby. anyone else go through this?


hey i am kinda in the same boat, my husband will be deploying in a couple months(our first deployment) and we have a 2 1/2 year old(3 in june), a 12 month old and an 18 DAY old. just stay strong, i don't know how i'll handle it either. go ahead and write me if you wanna talk

You can do it. DH deployed when our oldest was 3 weeks old and came back right before she turned a year. There were days I felt like just giving up... especially the nights that I was up until the following morning because she couldn't stop screaming (she had/has very bad eczema and she had a couple staph infections and bacterial infections while he was gone)... but having her around seemed to make the time go faster... she gave me a reason to get up and motivate when all I wanted to do was cry. It made me so much stronger and so much more independent... just keep tell yourself that it's not going to last forever, and that you are strong and CAN do it. :hugs If you ever need to vent you can PM me!

girl i'm right beside you, only i dont have a 3 year old I have a 19 month old. the kicker with us is my hubby is gone for a month for training, home for a month (baby will be born sometime while he's home, hopefully!) and then deploys. i am just as confused as you and i feel resentful towards everyonel; the military, my husband, even the unborn baby which is NOT good. we ladies need to stick together in times like these. dont i wish there were no war right now! good luck and if you need to vent pm me.

If I can do it you can do it.

I'm in your shoes, to a T. Except in our case, we don't even get a month.

PM me if you want to talk about it.