I just had to ask. I am going through my first deployment (14-months altogether), and the first month is gone....gone?...gone!! I've been having a very hard time during the last week...and I got on here as usual, to feel better. My question is: which really is the unprecedented hardest part? Granted, there may not be an answer to this. I've seen it posted that the first month is the hardest...after R&R...right before they come home...right before they leave...

I'm guessing that this is going to get harder for me, and I don't know why I feel that way.

:yay for a month down!!! For me month 3 was the hardest but everyone is different! Good Luck if you need anyone to talk to just pm me!

any holidays are hard for me:(

christmas/new years/ expecially my birthday

I'm sorry hun...Luckily I haven't had to deal with a deployment yet so I don't know what's hardest but I'm gonna have to deal with one soon. I'm soooooo not looking forward to it. But I agree with jasmin in where holidays are really tough without them

Well IM kinda right there with you. DH deployment is 14 mos total.. 2 mos down techinally, but the very end of the first month was the hardest for me too.. wierd huh.
Anyways, just wanted to say YEAH for 1 mo down... it feels good to mark off the whole month.
Feb seems be flying by also.

My hubby is deployed right now and we are into the 6 month of a 12-15 monther. I think the first month has been the worst for me so far. Funny enough after R & R I wasn't a big sobbing mess that I was before he got deployed. I did cry the day before we had to go our separate ways though.

I think it's different for everyone. I know that the last 5 or so months of this deployment are going to fly for me because I'm going to be going to school full time plus in the last stages of planning our wedding.

I think keeping yourself busy is the best remedy for time going too slowly. :yes

I hope you feel better soon :hugs

You know what each stage seems like its the hardest :giggle None of it seems to be all that great... but right now the closer it gets to him coming home the harder it seems. I feel like saying " OK THATS IT! IM DONE NOW! COME HOME!!! ":tantrum but then again i have no patience anymore :dunno

But If you had asked me in dec, i would have said the Holidays really sucked you know what!

So yeah I think it is different for each girl, but i do think that you never really "get used to it"

:hugehug

:congrats for getting through the first month!

I think its just all individual. For us right now is our hardest part. In the middle of march I will start looking for a house for us to rent so we are excited about that because he is due home some time in May. But this month its kinda like just a month. I know that sounds weird :lol but its true. So its all up to te individual. :hugehug

I agree that it's all individual. The hardest parts for me, where the first month, and the first week after he left to go back after R&R. I am almost a year in, and honestly, it has gone so much faster than I ever thought it would. Now there are only a few months left until he comes home. Hang in there, stay busy, and try not to dwell on it. You can do it! :hugs

DB is deployled right now...15 months total! 3 down!!! the end of the 2nd was hard for me...so are the holidays.....idk. i think its hard for everyone a random times....keep ur chin up hunny!!! yay for 1 month down!!!

Well congrats on getting through the first month!! For me, the hardest was after R & R. It was worse than when he left the first time! It seriously took me a month to get adjusted to him being gone again.. and it was horrible. Just keep yourself busy... the time will fly!

ALL HOLIDAYS AND SPECIAL DAYS BETWEEN HIM AND I ARE HARD FOR ME.

it depends on each person and what gets to them.

for me, this is my 3rd month and also the hardest so far due to circumstances such as our anniversary/valentines and not hearing from DB for over a week now...the longest i haven't heard from him since he deployed.

I say the hardest part for me is when I don't hear from him. I hadn't talked to him in a week, and when he finally called I cheered up a little. I am just nearing the end of my first month too, but I only have a 6 month deployment. Keep your head up, we can do this!

My hubby is deployed right now and expected home soon. Yea it was hard at first the day he left I curled up and cried all day. Now that he is coming home soon its actually harded. He didn't get to have leave so I don't know how that feels. Right now I think its just the excitement and anticipation of him coming home. The days just seem to drag. Good luck and we are here for you.

I'm only halfway through month two, but I found month one to be the more sad, depressing stage, and now I'm just kind of pissed off all the time. Neither is fun. But I'm hopeful that it will get better.

Thank you for all the replies. It definitely gives me something to look forward to and not feel so alone.

Everyone has their own opinion of what the hardest parts are. If you let all the opinions get in your head though, it may make you expect to feel terrible at all these different points. Stay positive! Don't anticipate the hard times. You have the first month behind you (in my opinion, the hardest) so you are on a roll! :hugs