Twink
03-16-2008, 08:16 AM
I thought I could avoid this....I thought we were going to be able to work things out. While there is still hope....Here I am nonetheless. :sadeyes
If you have seen some of my other posts this is how it all ends. He has decided he wants to be just friends right now. which infuriates me but Im trying to be patient. He's got all sorts of things going through his mind and says that he doesnt know where he is right now or where he's going so how can he know about us? He says he still loves me and that he's still devoted to me but was feeling trapped. Im thinking the combination of everything he is going through in coming back home along with the fact that he knows marriage wouldnt be too far away (or a proposal is expected in teh near future) he was starting to panic.
That hurts though you know.....after a year of giving him everything and dealing with his mood swings and the stress he's under and waiting by the phone and computer for some sort of contact from him and having my family (who never gets that close to anyone unless they are absolutely sure I am sure) accellerate their support and such for him and all of the sudden they are completely vested in him too.....after all of that, and here I am. Cast to the side as one of his friends in the end of all of this.
I dont want to be his friend....he's got more than enough female friends but I'll hang around as such for a while hoping he comes to his senses you know?
Anyways, so after nearly 2 years together, most of it being separated here we are. what pisses me off the most is he told me when he left, he was doing this for us....that we would be better from it in the end. I can hardly see how separation is better for us in the end.
So here I am, feeling like I have been punched in teh stomach over and over and over again. After nearly a year of support and devotion and comittment and everything else, he wants to be just friends. Not sure how long I will stay as such with him since it hurts to talk to him when he is much happier with me as "just a friend" but I will for a bit and hope that things turn around.
:pout:huh:gloomy:suicide:rant:unlove
Anyways, thanks so much for everything ladies......Even though I was as active as I would have liked to have been on here since there are some great ladies and support on here.
Not sure if much of this makes sense or if its just rambles but I have been through so much over the last week, just wanted to get all of that out somewhere. :sigh:unlove
If you have seen some of my other posts this is how it all ends. He has decided he wants to be just friends right now. which infuriates me but Im trying to be patient. He's got all sorts of things going through his mind and says that he doesnt know where he is right now or where he's going so how can he know about us? He says he still loves me and that he's still devoted to me but was feeling trapped. Im thinking the combination of everything he is going through in coming back home along with the fact that he knows marriage wouldnt be too far away (or a proposal is expected in teh near future) he was starting to panic.
That hurts though you know.....after a year of giving him everything and dealing with his mood swings and the stress he's under and waiting by the phone and computer for some sort of contact from him and having my family (who never gets that close to anyone unless they are absolutely sure I am sure) accellerate their support and such for him and all of the sudden they are completely vested in him too.....after all of that, and here I am. Cast to the side as one of his friends in the end of all of this.
I dont want to be his friend....he's got more than enough female friends but I'll hang around as such for a while hoping he comes to his senses you know?
Anyways, so after nearly 2 years together, most of it being separated here we are. what pisses me off the most is he told me when he left, he was doing this for us....that we would be better from it in the end. I can hardly see how separation is better for us in the end.
So here I am, feeling like I have been punched in teh stomach over and over and over again. After nearly a year of support and devotion and comittment and everything else, he wants to be just friends. Not sure how long I will stay as such with him since it hurts to talk to him when he is much happier with me as "just a friend" but I will for a bit and hope that things turn around.
:pout:huh:gloomy:suicide:rant:unlove
Anyways, thanks so much for everything ladies......Even though I was as active as I would have liked to have been on here since there are some great ladies and support on here.
Not sure if much of this makes sense or if its just rambles but I have been through so much over the last week, just wanted to get all of that out somewhere. :sigh:unlove