View Full Version : And here I am.....


Twink
03-16-2008, 08:16 AM
I thought I could avoid this....I thought we were going to be able to work things out. While there is still hope....Here I am nonetheless. :sadeyes

If you have seen some of my other posts this is how it all ends. He has decided he wants to be just friends right now. which infuriates me but Im trying to be patient. He's got all sorts of things going through his mind and says that he doesnt know where he is right now or where he's going so how can he know about us? He says he still loves me and that he's still devoted to me but was feeling trapped. Im thinking the combination of everything he is going through in coming back home along with the fact that he knows marriage wouldnt be too far away (or a proposal is expected in teh near future) he was starting to panic.

That hurts though you know.....after a year of giving him everything and dealing with his mood swings and the stress he's under and waiting by the phone and computer for some sort of contact from him and having my family (who never gets that close to anyone unless they are absolutely sure I am sure) accellerate their support and such for him and all of the sudden they are completely vested in him too.....after all of that, and here I am. Cast to the side as one of his friends in the end of all of this.

I dont want to be his friend....he's got more than enough female friends but I'll hang around as such for a while hoping he comes to his senses you know?
Anyways, so after nearly 2 years together, most of it being separated here we are. what pisses me off the most is he told me when he left, he was doing this for us....that we would be better from it in the end. I can hardly see how separation is better for us in the end.

So here I am, feeling like I have been punched in teh stomach over and over and over again. After nearly a year of support and devotion and comittment and everything else, he wants to be just friends. Not sure how long I will stay as such with him since it hurts to talk to him when he is much happier with me as "just a friend" but I will for a bit and hope that things turn around.

:pout:huh:gloomy:suicide:rant:unlove

Anyways, thanks so much for everything ladies......Even though I was as active as I would have liked to have been on here since there are some great ladies and support on here.

Not sure if much of this makes sense or if its just rambles but I have been through so much over the last week, just wanted to get all of that out somewhere. :sigh:unlove

phantomfg
03-16-2008, 08:27 AM
I'm so sorry you're experiencing this kind of pain. Stay here, and let this support group help you in your healing. It takes time to have it make sense. If even one of you isn't happy in the commitment, then parting is, sadly, for the best. Things could change one day though. Just, breath now, and be good to yourself. I know, it's so hard to do much of anything at this point in time. Just take it one day at a time, even on hour, until the pain lifts.

~*~Katie~*~
03-16-2008, 08:33 AM
Oh girl do I ever know what you are going through. Its hard to have them break up with you and not really know "why" just that they don't wanna be with you any more. :unlove My heart breaks for you. No one should have to go through this pain. Know that I am praying for you. If you wanna message me on AIM my screen name is Designer4theking and my Yahoo is the same. :hugs Keep your head up boo! You will make it through stronger than you've ever thought! Single life isn't half bad ;)

jen1982
03-16-2008, 09:06 AM
I am so sorry you are having to go through this. Don't leave the site just for that reason though. If you need support we are all here. I hope that things start to get better for you soon. :hugs

RunAwayLove
03-16-2008, 09:08 AM
im sorry hun :hugs

parents
03-16-2008, 10:39 AM
I am so sorry you are having to go through this. Don't leave the site just for that reason though. If you need support we are all here. I hope that things start to get better for you soon. :hugs

I agree, it would completely suck if u left. I hope he comes to his senses too, and sees u as more than a friend... :hugs

CoffeeGirl
03-16-2008, 10:40 AM
Don't leave sweety:hugs

OneRed911
03-16-2008, 10:58 AM
:hugs

Please don't leave...I didn't and I'm SO glad for that! The military might've brought us together but it's true friendships that keep us here.

I'm really sorry he's being this way. I understand completely! I got the "I love you but..." speech from my ex as well. It hurts but if you're truly meant to be together then he'll come back to you. If you're not then one day you'll meet someone who'd rather rip their heart out than tell you "I love you but..." Stay strong hon and know that we're all here for you.

MomWifeMe
03-16-2008, 11:03 AM
Sorry you have to go through this. :hugs

lemc81
03-16-2008, 11:04 AM
I'm so sorry hun. You've stuck by him for so long and it sucks that he is doing this. I hope when he comes home he'll realize what he's lost and you guys can work things out. And I agree with the other ladies, don't leave us! :hugs

Twink
03-16-2008, 11:58 AM
thanks so much ladies....just pisses me off (among many other things) to be at this point with him after all of this.
Then, as much as I know he loves me still and wants me in his life, Im just confused at how/why he is talking to me so much more now since all of this has happened rather than before. I know he feels better and ultimately, since I do love him, I want him happy through it all. Even more confusing is that he thought that since this is what he wanted and he was honest with me I would be okay with it. (stupid man) I'll likely stick by his side to support him through the rest of it (completely gaurded but I will) and hope and pray that in the end he comes back around to me. I just dont understand how after 2 years (and the last year apart) it comes to this. Im also tired of having to be so strong all the time for him. When does it turn around and he will be (or someone) will be strong for me to help me carry some of this stress? One day. I can take care of myself, really I can, it was just nice to have someone there (him there) to help me out and be with me for a while.

I know everything happens for a reason and even if the Lord decides to remove him from my life, Charles was in it for a reason.....it just hurts to have given up so much only to have my heart given back to me completely shattered.

Oh and dont worry, Im sticking around :)...you ladies are too great not to. I'll likely just lay low for a while until things get better and feel happier in my world again.

marinegirl85
03-16-2008, 03:23 PM
i'm sorry:hugs

ArmyWifey21
03-16-2008, 04:39 PM
I'm so sorry sweetie! That doesnt seem fair that after everything you've been through with this deployment that it comes to this, but hopefully he'll come to his senses:hugs Hope everything works out

Godders_Girl80
03-16-2008, 07:17 PM
I'm so sorry hun. I really hope that he is just paniced and when he comes back (or evern before) he realizes the error of his ways. Other than that I hope you can keep it together no matter what happens in the long run. We love you and you alwars have us at SOS for support. :hugs

AmandaW
03-17-2008, 01:11 AM
im sorry! :bigsadhug

soldiersangel
03-17-2008, 01:16 AM
I'm so sorry hun :hugs :hugs :hugs Stay strong.