I really took it to heart after reading about all the problems some of the posters on this forum have been experiencing since their SO's have returned. The distancing of themselves from family/friends ect....So I sent the following letter; PM if you want to hear the responses I rec'd to date;

Hello Ladies!
Sorry about the complied email but each of you collectively represent the ECRC, FRG and Chaplain's office.

I have a real question/concern and I'm hoping you can each give me the set guidelines to offer the women/family members I am writing to you about.

I belong to www.militarysos.com (Military Significan Others and Spouse support). It is a huge forum board with thousands of members. I'm sure you all are aware of it. I joined when my husband deployed back in Sept/Oct for the lack of a better support system. I know that the ECRC and the FRG have been working towards offering more support to I.A. families and basically all family members of the troops.

I have noticed a trend on the forum board. ALOT (hundreds?) of women, spouses & girlfriends are having their SO's return from combat duty only to show signs of PTSD (pushing the emotional family ties away, disappearing without phone contact, stating they need alone time, breaking up the relationships ect...). I want to offer the best points of contacts for these ladies.

Now I have already suggested they contact their spouses FRG. Alot of them do not believe the the FRG's have anything to offer them. They have questions regarding mental health. Quite a few of them say that the PTSD support groups are hours from their hometowns (alot of the servicemembers are reservists). That getting mental health appointments are left up to the servicemember and if the servicmember refuses treatment then what do they do? Is there mental health support for the family members? (such as ALANON for families of alcholics).

And what do the girlfriends do? They certainly are left out of the loop. Some have lived with their SO's for years, have children with them but since their status is "girlfriend" they are left out.

These ladies need answers. Not an 800 number. If they don't know the correct questions or procedure then these servicemembers are falling thru the cracks.

Can you all send me what ever is the best info to pass along to these ladies?

Thank you!