hi im Letzia, i live in Ohio and my "friend" is currently deployed to Iraq.
So heres the thing, and im really hoping for some honest answers and some understanding because i do not know what to think or what to do anymore.
So lets call him J.
Ok J. and i have been friends for a while but not like close friends, actually we rarely ever hung out. Anyhow, he got deployed and as it goes, we kept in touch with email and such like and actually talked more since the deployment than what we ever did when he was here.
So when we talk, its really nice, you know like there could be more but im not getting clear signals.
He sent me gifts and he calls as often as he can, or we email. im just not sure where this is going, i get mixed feelings from him and i dont want to ask and rush things as i know he obviously has more to worry about than me falling for him:blush
i dont know if its a friend thing to him or more, i think i want more.
Do you guys think im getting this all wrong and its really just J. trying to keep in touch with home? What should i do, and how should i be supportive without suffocating him with feelings he may not feel in return? Im super confused and i hope this made some kind of sense:confuzzle

well you know what i am in the same boat as you are and im not gonna lie ....im trying to figure out things lately !

any advice?

Maybe you should give your feelings time to process and see what happens . Did he ever tell you what his feelings are for you ?

ask him:D seriously worked for me:D he said he was afraid to bring it up in case i wasnt thinking the way he was and now im in the best relationship eva! minus the whole deployment thing lol :D :goodluck

he says he misses me and is always thinking about me but thats as far as it goes, he makes no kind of suggestion as to wether or not we will be "hooking up" for alack of better words when he returns and thats like at least 6 months from now and the not knowing is really bugging me.
:arg

The next time you talk to him just explain to him how you feel.

Just be like "hey, am I alone in this or is there something between us for real going on? Because I want to know what's up. I can't be in between here and putting my life on hold, not knowing if this is going to work out."

Basically the same thing I said to DB before we got together, he shared my feelings too. He was just nervous I wasn't returning.

So best of luck hun :) Keep us posted on what happens.

I agree, just ask him what is up. That way you don't have to second guess yourself!

i know you girls are totally right i should just say it but im actually really worried hes going to say its no more than a friends thing for him:sigh

Well..you will never know until you ask! :)

Don't be scared...go in confident!

i feel like such a little kid:arg:hehe i cant believe i dont have the guts to bring the subject up, i was hoping..and ive been hoping for months already that he would say something, just something that would let me know he feels it too, but nada:arg
ugh, im so silly, i should just say it....but i will chicken out again:hehe
or what if the fact that hes not hinting towards a relationship actually means he does not want one.
paranoid much:duh

so sorry, i just had to get this off my chest:sigh

I would just ask him too... But if you plan on still talking to him even if he says he doesn't have "feelings" for you, I would make sure to tell him that too! :) Just let him know that you still love to talk to him and enjoy hearing from him and stuff so that if you are his "connection" back home, he won't feel that he's lost that connection if he tells you he doesn't have feelings for you. Ya know? Anyways, I hope everything actually turns out good for you! It's a really cute situation that you're in to be honest... It made me smile when I read it! So if you do "hook up" you'll have a good story to tell your grandkids hahaha

I would ask him!!! And be honest about how you feel!! Thats the best way to go! let me say, my DB has been gone for 3 months, and i haven't gotten anything from him (well, only letters)!! So, if he is sending you things....I'm sure he is for real! But....saying something will clear things up! If its meant to be, it will be......so, find out! Don't wait 6 months to a year to find out that its just friends....then time is waisted!!!

But, find out!!! you deserve to know!!! Good luck!

DB and I got close as friends during his last deployment. Somewhere along the way we both realized that it could be more than a friends thing, so we planned a date when he came home. Our first date was 4 days after he came back from the sandbox. Here we are, 7 months later (oh wow how time flies!), going strong.

You'll never know unless you ask!