news article from the seattle p-i

Not all kisses at Safeco Field are equal
By ROBERT L. JAMIESON Jr.
P-I COLUMNIST
http://seattlepi.nwsource.com/jamieson/365294_robert31.html

A KISS IS just a kiss -- except when snooping eyes see it as something else: unacceptable lip locking between two lesbians in family-friendly Safeco Field.

Then, it becomes something else -- a controversy.

Sirbrina Guerrero, 23, went to the Mariners game Monday on a date with a 21-year-old woman who is still in the closet.

The couple exchanged intermittent pecks and kisses, Guerrero said. Nothing more. No tongues touched, which is understandable -- the women had been wolfing down garlic fries.

In the third inning a stadium usher, who appeared to be in his mid-20s, approached the couple. He told them to cease their public displays of affection, or else.

Why?

"Because you've been making out the whole time," Guerrero recalled the usher telling them. "A woman complained that she and her child saw you two."

Guerrero, a cocktail waitress who lives in Seattle, said the man added, "There's children in the crowd. It's not fair for parents to have to explain to their kids why two women are kissing."

With those words, the usher crossed the line.

Instead of sticking to printed stadium policy, the usher freelanced and made it seem as if Safeco Field and the Mariners endorse a prejudiced point of view. They don't.

The Mariners' official code of conduct prohibits "unacceptable behavior" including abusive language, obscene gestures, drunkenness and "displays of affection not appropriate in a public, family setting" -- which, of course, is open to interpretation.

"We're still looking into what happened," Rebecca Hale, director of public relations for the Mariners, told me Friday.

She explained that the usher -- the Mariners use the term "seating host" -- was responding to a fan's complaint about a couple that "was groping and making out."

I asked her if "making out" was a problem here because it was extreme behavior or because it involved people of the same gender.

Hale replied: "We observe and act on reports about behavior."

But, she added quickly, if it turns out the two women were "just pecking each other," then the usher's response would be deemed inappropriate.

The Mariners are trying to track down the usher to get more details, but the team said his phone number didn't work, and he's not due back at the stadium until mid-June.

"We treat the concerns of the women seriously," Hale said. She paused before adding: "This is a good opportunity for us to remind our staff of what the policy is and how it should be applied."

Sure doesn't sound like a vote of confidence to me.

Guerrero and her date said they were showing affection appropriate for a public setting. After the usher confronted Guerrero, her date and their four female friends in Section 341, one of the women took a photo of a straight couple making out -- and being left blissfully alone.

Apparently, not all kisses are equal.

Angry, confused and hurt, three of Guerrero's friends sought out a supervisor in guest services. They've filed a formal written complaint with the Mariners.

But get this -- when Guerrero and her friends told the usher they were going to seek out his boss, he seemed to backtrack.

"He said, 'I am just the messenger here,' " Guerrero's friend, Melissa Benavides, a Seattle radio personality known as Jordin Silver on KNDD-FM 107.7 "The End," recalled him saying.

Just the messenger?

Regardless of whether the usher was sharing his personal thoughts or relaying the views of the mom riled up by women kissing, he ended up sending the wrong message: that gays or lesbians who show any public affection deserve to be singled out.

The right thing for the Mariners to do is tell these women: We're sorry. We apologize for ruining the game experience. We apologize for making you feel humiliated and ashamed.

Benavides said that if Guerrero and her date -- neither of whom were drinking at the game -- were acting inappropriately, she'd be the last one to defend them.

"I would have told them to cut it out," Benavides said. "But what they were doing was totally PG."

It is beyond me how the usher could be blind to straight couples smooching but zero in on Guerrero and her girlfriend.

Then again, eyes only see what they choose to.

Two young lesbians sharing moments of summer love at the ballpark were just too much -- straight out of left field for those with closed minds.

what do you think? do you have a problem with same sex pda? what if it's in a "family" area?

I don't kiss my hubs in public..:shrug no one wants to see that..

I have a problem with there being any differentiation between PDAs of hereo couples and same-sex couples. What is good for one ought to be good for the other.
Personally, I am not for intense PDAs for ANYONE - a snuggle, a peck, a hug, handholding -sure, groping and "making out", no thanks - don't want to see it!

If it was just pecking then the usher is WAY out of line. That comment he made leads me to believe it was general pecking and someone got a hair up their ass about it being two women.

I have a problem with there being any differentiation between PDAs of hereo couples and same-sex couples. What is good for one ought to be good for the other.
Personally, I am not for intense PDAs for ANYONE - a snuggle, a peck, a hug, handholding -sure, groping and "making out", no thanks - don't want to see it!

that's pretty much how i feel.

I see no problem with what the women were doing. If it were obscene making out, groping, etc... it would be mildly inapropriate no matter the orientation of the couple. IMHO. I think the usher needs a reality check. I think his personal views are in the way of him doing his job in a courteous manner.

I don't see the problem if they were just exchanging a few pecks. I mean seriously, I could understand if there was full blown tongue swapping groping making out and I wouldn't want to see that from ANYONE doesn't matter if they are male/female, male/male/, or female/female.
The usher was out of line.

I'm not into seeing ANYONE make out in public. I would rather not have my child watch someone playing tounge tag with their bf/gf whomever. I don't care what sexual orientation they are.

I don't mind if a couple peck kisses or hugs, holds hands.. Etc in public. I also don't care what their preference is.

I think theres a time and a place for everything.

Edit: I was speaking in general, not about the couple mentioned in the article.

ok, on the flip side, you're a parent seated in the family section with your kids & there's a homosexual couple engaged in "light" pda. does that matter to you?

I see no problem with what the women were doing. If it were obscene making out, groping, etc... it would be mildly inapropriate no matter the orientation of the couple. IMHO. I think the usher needs a reality check. I think his personal views are in the way of him doing his job in a courteous manner.

:tu

I'm not one for PDA. When people make out in public, of any gender, it's uncomfortable. But just pecks? Come on. They were absolutely singled out because they are gay. That's horrible. Family area or not, they shouldn't have to hide their affection for one another. It doesn't sound like they were 'groping' each other. So what if parents have to then explain it to their children. They should have to do that anyway. You can't lock your kid in a homophobic closet and pretend there aren't any gay people in the world.

I'm not one for PDA. When people make out in public, of any gender, it's uncomfortable. But just kissing? Come on. They were absolutely singled out because they are gay. That's horrible. Family area or not, they shouldn't have to hide their affection for one another. It doesn't sound like they were 'groping' each other. So what if parents have to then explain it to their children. They should have to do that anyway. You can't lock your kid in a homophobic closet and pretend there aren't any gay people in the world.

you get a double :tu :tu for that :lol

Gay PDA doesn't bother me at all. :dunno

In moderation, PDA doesn't bother me..... a few kisses here and there, or hugs... whatever... doesn't bother me at all.... regardless of what sex the couples are.

Actually, it makes me happy to see people who aren't afraid to show that they care about eachother.

I kiss my hubby in public really often (unless hes in uniform)... Its just the way we are... (and I guess culturally in PR theres nothing weird about PDA... so it just stuck)

I would hope that same sex couples get the same freedom to show their affection... even in public.

I'm not one for PDA. When people make out in public, of any gender, it's uncomfortable. But just pecks? Come on. They were absolutely singled out because they are gay. That's horrible. Family area or not, they shouldn't have to hide their affection for one another. It doesn't sound like they were 'groping' each other. So what if parents have to then explain it to their children. They should have to do that anyway. You can't lock your kid in a homophobic closet and pretend there aren't any gay people in the world.

:yes :agree Very well said!!!

The kids are gonna find out sooner or later.... why not be upfront and honest about it with them? It'll save a lot of confusion later on. Or at least I'd think.

I kiss my hubby in public really often (unless hes in uniform)... Its just the way we are... (and I guess culturally in PR theres nothing weird about PDA... so it just stuck)

I would hope that same sex couples get the same freedom to show their affection... even in public.

Just curious.... where is/what is PR? What does it stand for? :)

I'm not one for PDA. When people make out in public, of any gender, it's uncomfortable. But just pecks? Come on. They were absolutely singled out because they are gay. That's horrible. Family area or not, they shouldn't have to hide their affection for one another. It doesn't sound like they were 'groping' each other. So what if parents have to then explain it to their children. They should have to do that anyway. You can't lock your kid in a homophobic closet and pretend there aren't any gay people in the world.

Yep, I totally agree.

Just curious.... where is/what is PR? What does it stand for? :)

I think it's Puerto Rico.

ok, on the flip side, you're a parent seated in the family section with your kids & there's a homosexual couple engaged in "light" pda. does that matter to you?

Nope i am not big on PDA between any couples but if a same sex couple (or ANY couple really) is holding hands giving pecks our anything tame like that I don't care. I don't want to see anyone groping their SO (same sex or not) or swapping spit or anything that could be on skinamax after 11 pm. My oldest already knows that different people like different people and that is OK. We don't make a big deal about it because we wouldn't make a big deal about a heterosexual couple or a mixed race couple so why would we make a big tado about same sex? Everyone is a person of worth and we all have the right to find love.

Honestly I don't care WHO is doing the PDA, I think it's gross and look away. I have no desire to see other people of any sex tongue wrestling. Pecks, I have no problem with no matter what their sexual anatomy. Unless it's old people. That just freaks me out.

So what if parents have to then explain it to their children. They should have to do that anyway. You can't lock your kid in a homophobic closet and pretend there aren't any gay people in the world.

You can if you live in Iran I hear. :teehee

Honestly I don't care WHO is doing the PDA, I think it's gross and look away. I have no desire to see other people of any sex tongue wrestling. Pecks, I have no problem with no matter what their sexual anatomy. Unless it's old people. That just freaks me out.



See, I love to see old people giving each other a little PG loving.

See, I love to see old people giving each other a little PG loving.

Me too! I think it's sweet. :wub Old people giving each other the tongue... not so sweet. :pukey

See, I love to see old people giving each other a little PG loving.

That's the best part about Kiss Cams at sports stadiums.. :wub the wittle bitty old people giving smoochies to each other on the Kiss Cam. :wub

Me too! I think it's sweet. :wub Old people giving each other the tongue... not so sweet. :pukey

ITA with you there!

I think it's Puerto Rico.

Oh.... duh :duh

I don't like to see ANY PDA's, it doesn't matter to me what the sex of the couples are, I think it should be for private. JMO

ok, on the flip side, you're a parent seated in the family section with your kids & there's a homosexual couple engaged in "light" pda. does that matter to you?

light no

Short of intercourse or exposing yourself, I am 100% AGAINST any "legislation" or "rule" that says you can't make out with whomever you want. I don't show a whole lot of PDA in public and don't like to see it... but I shudder at the thought of living in a place where you can be arrested for kissing someone.

I have the same limits as I would for a hetero couple...there is nothing wrong with showing affection...but keep it PG

the usher was way wrong to tell those ladies to stop.
but a lot of the country is not ready for same-sex relationships to be in public!

i don't hang all over my husband, tangle tongues, etc in public, and i expect others to have the same courtesy, same sex or not. hand holding, pecks, etc are fine with me.. i don't have a problem WHATSOEVER with homosexual relationships.

in a family environment though, i would say leave the PDAs at home. my husband and i don't PDA at the ballfield we go to. we go to watch the game and have a good time, not fan the flames of desire.

Short of intercourse or exposing yourself, I am 100% AGAINST any "legislation" or "rule" that says you can't make out with whomever you want. I don't show a whole lot of PDA in public and don't like to see it... but I shudder at the thought of living in a place where you can be arrested for kissing someone.

Sing it sistah! :five

I don't really have anything to add except I agree with Wicked and Goldi, and everytime I see the thread, I keep thinking that you're talking about people having a PDA (like the little electronics PDA) the same sex as them... like girl PDA's for girls and boy PDA's for boys.

It's been a loooong day :lol

keep it PG
whatever kind of couple, doesnt matter
little kisses, holding hands, hugs, etc... are fine, ya know Disney approved behavior ;)

hardcore face sucking is not okay in public regardless of sexual orientation
:wow

You can if you live in Iran I hear. :teehee

There are no homosexuals in Iran. Ahmadinejad would not lie.

I mean look at his face, does it look like the face of a liar?

http://64bitheadlines.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/ahmadinejad.jpg

I dont mind light pda, a peck, holding hands, etc. My husband and I do that. Do I mind my children seeing that? no, because they will see it one day and I would rather it be me to tell them what is going on. I was brought up that it was wrong but really who am I to judge someone for falling in love wether it be same sex or not. Love is love. I want my kids to know that too.

There are no homosexuals in Iran. Ahmadinejad would not lie.

I mean look at his face, does it look like the face of a liar?

http://64bitheadlines.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/ahmadinejad.jpg

:rofl Hey, he is totally telling the truth! Don't you know they all flee or are killed? Don't forget that his definition of homosexual is different too.. Sex with the same sex doesn't equal gay as long as it isn't ONLY sex with the same sex. Men are for fun, women are for baby making.

Running + death / convenient definition = NO HOMOSEXUALS! DUH!

A kiss is a kiss. Making out is a little different.

If they kissed a few times, big deal. :shrug

Either the usher was just an ass, or there is more to the story.

There are no homosexuals in Iran. Ahmadinejad would not lie.

I mean look at his face, does it look like the face of a liar?

http://64bitheadlines.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/ahmadinejad.jpg

Yup, because they are either put to death or considered "straight" and only using anal sex as "male bonding" which isn't gay. :screwy He isn't a liar, he's delusional. :lol

I have no problem with same-sex couples being affectionate in public. I agree with those of you who says that when it goes from being "holding hands/snuggles/quick peck" to "full on make-out/someone screaming 'get a room'"... that's when it becomes a problem.

I think it is wonderful when people can be affectionate... not over the top mind you... I don't want to see groping or making out or any of that... but kisses every now and then, holding hands, hugging... all very wonderful. physical affection is a wonderful thing that EVERYONE should be allowed to have.

even in the 'family section' I see nothing wrong with kissing once in a while, holding hands.. hugging... regardless of your sex. I think that showing HEALTHY relationships to children is better than acting like no one touches. I would rather my children seeing people be happy and kiss than to think that no one should ever touch... hugs and kisses are too wonderful. and CAN be PG.

I just have a problem with too much PDA from anyone, beyond holding hands, who wants to see anyone making out no matter if it is same sex or different, kwim?

I'm not comfortable with ANYONE massively making out in public - I find it distasteful. Some things just need to be kept private.

Yup, because they are either put to death or considered "straight" and only using anal sex as "male bonding" which isn't gay. :screwy He isn't a liar, he's delusional. :lol

So you mean when Patrick and I are drunk and he's trying to get me to have anal sex I can tell him "No thank you. I do not want to have "male bonding" time with you" and it will work?

So you mean when Patrick and I are drunk and he's trying to get me to have anal sex I can tell him "No thank you. I do not want to have "male bonding" time with you" and it will work?

For the record, you now owe me a new keyboard -- I just spit tea reading that.............

I haven't read the replies - but I'm going to kick in my .02.

Living in Seattle I've heard about this story MULTIPLE times over the last few days. They were not "making out". It was no different than the kisses I give DH in public each and every day that I actually have the opportunity to do so. I think it's ridiculous, and I think it was blown entirely out of proportion.

I dont like to see PDA in any form 2 men, 2 woman, man woman. I just don't like it.

I don't like to see ANY PDA's, it doesn't matter to me what the sex of the couples are, I think it should be for private. JMO

same here....:pukey.... no spank you! I have just now gotten comfortable with holding DH's hand in public. I just think some things are meant to stay at home, in private.

I haven't read the replies - but I'm going to kick in my .02.

Living in Seattle I've heard about this story MULTIPLE times over the last few days. They were not "making out". It was no different than the kisses I give DH in public each and every day that I actually have the opportunity to do so. I think it's ridiculous, and I think it was blown entirely out of proportion.

Ditto:)

I have a problem with there being any differentiation between PDAs of hereo couples and same-sex couples. What is good for one ought to be good for the other.
Personally, I am not for intense PDAs for ANYONE - a snuggle, a peck, a hug, handholding -sure, groping and "making out", no thanks - don't want to see it!

:agree

Yeah, sounds like the usher was an asshat.

I just wanted to add--I dislike over the top PDA--but at reunions like let's say..homecomings..I just shrug it off because no one has seen their SO in months and we're all feeling a little deprived.

It sounds like these women were fine and someone was being a homophobe about some pecking. Amazing considering this is Seattle. Shame on the usher, I think an apology is owed to the women.

dude pda is pda no matter which team u are on. People are stupid and need to get over themselves. Also some pda b/w heterosexual couples is totally gross compared to the homosexuals... :dunno what the big deal is

I'm not comfortable with ANYONE massively making out in public - I find it distasteful. Some things just need to be kept private.

Agreed.

I don't like massive make outs in public for either gender or orientation. It's sloppy and nasty.

Yeah, you're deeply in love, I get it. Now go suck face somewhere else.

(hubs is still having issues getting me to do anything more than hold hands and peck on the lips in public ><

I don't care about pecks and hugs and holding hands from any couple no matter the sexual orientation. I don't however care to see anyone shove their tounge down each others throat or grope each other in public no matter if they are hetero or homosexual. Its just tacky.
Also, if there was a homosexual couple seated next to us and our son just enjoying each other and life and having a few pecks here or there it wouldn't bother us at all. They are just people like me or you.

i don't want to see groping or tonsil hockey from anyone in public. use the same discretion as you would if you were in front of your mother, better yet your grandmother. a sweet peck--no big deal, hand holding--no big deal but sucking face :pukey whether you are gay, straight or anything in between

I have a problem with there being any differentiation between PDAs of hereo couples and same-sex couples. What is good for one ought to be good for the other.
Personally, I am not for intense PDAs for ANYONE - a snuggle, a peck, a hug, handholding -sure, groping and "making out", no thanks - don't want to see it!

I agree completely.

I don't mind a certain degree of PDA but after that... :puke And it doesn't matter, PDA is PDA, same sex or not.

I don't care about PDA from anyone as long as it isn't excessive.

I don't think that it would be an issue for my children to see a same sex couple kissing, because I wouldn't raise my children to believe that there's an issue with homosexuality. I'd raise them to believe that strong, supportive, loving relationships are healthy. Period.

Love is love, Kissing is Kissing and
PDA is PDA. If two guys are kissing
its the same as a guy and a girl. same
Emotions are being shown between
the two.

I also agree with people here, massive
making out is annoying and people need
to do it in their own area of living. I
kiss my DB in public but a peck here
and there not full tongue and such.

I also agree with people here, massive
making out is annoying and people need
to do it in their own area of living. I
kiss my DB in public but a peck here
and there not full tongue and such.

Totally OT - do you write your posts like that on purpose or is there some wierd formatting bug at play? Enquiring minds want to know:D

I write it like that on purpose,
cause I am just that cool :toocool lol

Really? That just seems like so much work :dunno

-shrugs- all it is it pressing enter
a lot lol

I'm not one for PDA. When people make out in public, of any gender, it's uncomfortable. But just pecks? Come on. They were absolutely singled out because they are gay. That's horrible. Family area or not, they shouldn't have to hide their affection for one another. It doesn't sound like they were 'groping' each other. So what if parents have to then explain it to their children. They should have to do that anyway. You can't lock your kid in a homophobic closet and pretend there aren't any gay people in the world.

:agree Very well said.. that is pretty much how I view things as well :tu

So you mean when Patrick and I are drunk and he's trying to get me to have anal sex I can tell him "No thank you. I do not want to have "male bonding" time with you" and it will work?

:hystericlaugh