Ok, this is a breastfeeding/formula feeding question, but it is NOT a debate about which one to do. It's a legitimate concern I have, and I really hope I'm not opening a can of worms here. :)

I was always a big proponent of breast-feeding for at least a year. I was determined to nurse DS as long as I could. It was always just something that wasn't even a question for me. My ideals were dashed when my baby was born at a hungry 10 lbs, 9 oz. My body physically could not keep up with his needs, volume-wise, and the doctors eventually told me I would have to supplement with formula due to the baby's severe jaundice. I breastfed and formula fed for about two months, and my milk supply slowly just dried up, despite pumping to keep up the flow and help from a lactation specialist. I now formula-feed exclusively.

I cannot describe to you the intense feelings of guilt that came with "giving up" on breastfeeding. My son is healthy, and the switch was not my choice or my fault, but I can't shake this feeling. Every time we go buy formula and I see the price tag I cringe with guilt and every time I mix a bottle I choke up. I have never felt so guilty about anything in my life.

Have any of you experienced this? What did you do to get over these feelings? I'm convinced I gave it my best effort. Like I said, my son is healthy and happy, but it's been 5 months since I stopped nursing him and the feeling has not gotten any better. Do you have any advice for me?

Thanks in advance.

Dont feel guilty!! I only BF Bailey for 3 months. My milk just didnt agree with her. As long as your baby is healthy and happy you are doing a wonderful job.

Exactly, please don't feel guilty. You made a change in an effort to get your son the nutrition he needs to be healthy. That's not denying him anything!

To be honest, I wonder the same thing. Not to bore those that have heard it a thousand times, but I had a breast reduction years ago where they removed the nipple. My dr's and lactation consultants were surprised I produced and could get out any milk. I only did it for a little under 6 weeks. I had to supplement also, as I either didn't produce enough or didn't have enough intact milk ducts to get it out. (I used the SNS supplemental system to try to help with the stimulation to produce more milk). I stopped when we had to make back to back trips to New England for 5 + days each for my FIL's illness that turned into him passing away.

Honestly, though I don't think I gave it my best. I didn't pump enough. I could have done more I am sure, and I can't seem to let go of that guilt. Everytime I read a FF vs. BF thread on here (I can't seem to just not look at them) I have even more guilt. Everytime my son roots at my breast I get tears in my eyes. It KILLS me.

Yesterday in the shower, I squeezed my nipples and had droplets of milk in each. I feel like I should give it another go. Even though, I know and have been told I don't produce enough. (never had that "full breast" feeling, never once got engorged, even when I stopped). I saw someone on here write it took them a year to get over the guilt. I sure hope I get over it before then. I hope you do too!

Sorry for threadjacking just to say I empathize and TOTALLY understand how you feel.