A poll covering the 3 traditional "roles" that we have at hand in a family.

Which one do you BELIEVE IS BEST for your family (not necessary how your family functions at the moment or will in the future) for the overall family when the kids are young.

Discuss

each family has a reason for their roles. currently we contribute financially equally. but we dont have kids.

I voted other because I believe that each family has to find whatever works best for THEM. Not two families are alike so finding what works for that particular family is important. Sometimes over time family dynamic change because of job loss/going back to work/illness etc as well.

i actually do not believe there is one set traditional family that is better than another. i believe that in some areas and lifestyles that require equality where there is not an actual stay at home parent.

example my aunt and uncle raised 5 children and both of them worked. in fact all of them worked , they owned a dairy farm and the kids and parents all worked together to make it work.

another example of that is when they live in the city. we all know with gas prices and inflation being what it is that being a one income family can be very difficult and in some cities nearly impossible.

with other lifestyles i think it is possible for one of the parents to be home with the children and the other work . the military lifestyle tends to lead families in that direction, or at least that is my experience with it.

i will not play the gender role though. i think you are a parent no matter your gender and therefore capable of the same love and affection as the other would have. so to me honestly the gender of the parent plays no role in parenting.

another thing is single parenting. that is another traditional parenting that has been around as long as there have been families.

i believe no one is better than another and that no one is worse than the other. they all come with some sacrifices and some rewards.

i think the part that is important is the way you parent and the children your raise more than one what society views as a proper family etc.....

i hope this makes sense we have drama in my house right now !

I voted husband and wife share because I think it depends on the family but the ultimate accountability for these things falls equally on both. DF and I plan on trading off.

For us, at the moment, me staying at home while John works is best.

When the kids are older then I'll work, too.

we share equally and typical sahm style. dh works and i stay at home so i do most of the stuff but when he's home we are quite equal.

Right now, SAHM works best for our family. Once the kids are in school, I will be back to doing what I love. I really detest being a SAHM but I believe it's best for my child(ren) in the early childhood years. I really prefer when we are contributing equally, and look forward to going back to that in a few yrs.

Since you asked for "our" family, rather than "families in general" I said both sharing. I am a WAHM which works great for us.

I put share equally.

When we first got married and had Nora I was the major bread winner of the house. He worked part time while preparing to enter the Navy and took care of Nora while I was at work.

Now I am a SAHM and he is the major breadwinner.

Both ways have worked for us and we are both very flexible about whatour family may need in the future.

I have been blessed that I have a husband who is secure enough with himself that if there was an opportunity for me to make more money than him, he would have NO problem with staying home either full or part time.

I chose SAHM and EQUAL. Currently we both work, but we dont have any kids or anything, its just the two of us. We have talked about me staying home when we have kids until they are in school. Once they are in school I will start out part time if not fulltime working again. I only plan on working while my kids are not in school if I have to, and only time will determine that.

For us the dad works, me at home will probably always exist. Honestly kids need you more when they are older than they really do when they are young. I don't want my teenage kids coming home to an empty house! Yeah.....NOOO thanks!

I'll probably start working part time when we move....I never plan on working full time honestly........I probably won't ever have to.

I don't like myself when I don't work. I feel like I am not doing enough.... but also, we don't have kids yet. Once we have kids, we have talked about him being the major breadwinner until he retires from the army (and now he doesn't know if he wants to re-enlist or not, which throws a minor wrench into this plan) and then after he retires, he will take care of the kids whilst they are teenagers, and I can work and he can deal with the insanity that is teenaged children. I hope that's what happens.

We currently don't have any kids but when we do I believe that Husband and Wife share child/work responsibilities equally would work best for OUR family just because of where we are at in our lives. I don't think there is one right family situation though

If you vote, make sure you don't mind it being public since it can be seen by all! Just an FYI. ;)

My vote is for SAHM style!

i voted SAHM.

I HATE being a SAHM. I get bored easily, the kids prefer to play with each other or by themselves. They have actually closed the door in my face before to play in one of their rooms. I put share equally. It works best when one isn't tired and overlooked all the time. Men should be able to take care of kids even when they do work. I always tell me DH that yes, his work day does end but you still have responsibilities that you will come home to.

I can never and will never be a SAHM. I'd kill someone! :teehee

Once we have children I want to be a SAHM for the first few years, I have no problem with staying in school but it is more just those first few years I don't want my child in daycare.

Other...
Neither of us want children (She realized that this weekend...for now)
We each need to work to keep from going insane.
We each try to do whatever work needs to be done around the house, with her telling me what housework I need to do and me doing it, and her doing the rest.

For us the SAHM works best right now. Neither of us mind it. I do ask him to help out a bit when hes home because I don't get days off or vacations. House work doesn't wait or go on vacation.

At some point in our lives we've done all the options you have. The SAHD sucked because he didn't do a darn thing except feed the kids and change a few diapers. I put in a full day at work and then had to come home and do all the house hold duties as well.

Both of us working wasn't bad. No one was home during the day so the house stayed clean for the most part. I still did the majority of the house hold duties though.

We both work and share the parenting responsibilities.

FOR ME Sahm and that's what I voted for. I truely believe it's what's best.
BUT it's not for everyone. SOme people can't NOT work. Some people are BETTER parents if they aren't SAHM's and there isn't a thing wrong with that.
For my brother being a SAHD is what works best for them. He does freelance work and the majority he can do from home.