Am I over reacting? I havent gotten an email from DB in over a week now, and his birthday is on Thursday, I ordered him a cake and had it sent to him, I dont know if he got it. I have sent him several messages in general. The last one I was just asking for an "Im OK". He was just on......Nothing. How come I dont get it? I mean I understand that he may not have much time...but I just feel like Im pushing him away, especially when he is not responding. It starting to hurt my feelings. Maybe its my fault, cause Im the type of person that needs reassurance. I just need to know that things are ok with him and with "us". I dont know what to say to him to get through, I just feel like all my efforts are worth nothing .
All I do is feel like Im bugging him, he said that Im not. Im getting to the point where I dont know what to say to him anymore. I know it shouldnt, but its really starting to hurt me. And all I want to do is leave work right now and go home get in bed and cry. I mean I dont know if he is thinking about me, you'd think he would find the time to let me know. Right now, I'm really doubting things and I dont know if I should. I cant stand the emotions right now its worse than PMS. One second I feel like crap, how I am now, the next minute Im telling myself Im being stupid about all of this, and the next I feel like Im going insane, and at other times I feel like I dont even have a boyfriend.
I feel like I am the only one sitting here in my own little world. And I have no one that I can really talk to who gets it. I feel so pathetic that no response or a response from him can make, or break my day. I am so short with everyone, and have very little patience for much, and I feel so bad cause no one deserves it. When I do talk to my friends I feel as if they just think Im being dumb about everything. I hate this, all Im asking for is 2 words from him...IM OK. :tears

:hugs

Honestly, if I were you, I'd try to turn those nerves into positive energy. Why don't you go for a run or work out or go out and do something? That way it takes some time off of the worrying and maybe will give him a chance to respond. I know what it's like to sit around, worrying whether I'll hear or not.. and it's just better to step away for a bit and try to clear my head.

I think it is normal... I get all of those crazy feelings too... I am in a little rut myself right now. PM me if you ever want to chat...

:hugs:hugs

by the way..

:bdaysong

I know this may sound mean but just step back and let him contact you. It might be if he doesn't hear from you in a while he will wonder what is going on. It will be really hard but some times they need to be reminded that there are two people in the relationship. Then when he contacts you let him know that all your asking for is even a minute phone call that says " Hi, I'm OK". Sorry if this is too harsh.

Our first deployment I would go weeks without communication and then all of a sudden he had updated his entire myspace! wtf? You have time to pick out some lame ass snowboarding background but you can't shoot me a quick hello?

This is one of those things you will just have to wait out. I'm sure he isn't trying to be difficult or hurtful. Maybe the next time you talk bring it up in a playful way so he doesn't think you are jumping on him.

:hugs

I know this may sound mean but just step back and let him contact you. It might be if he doesn't hear from you in a while he will wonder what is going on. It will be really hard but some times they need to be reminded that there are two people in the relationship. Then when he contacts you let him know that all your asking for is even a minute phone call that says " Hi, I'm OK". Sorry if this is too harsh.

I dont think its harsh. Cause that was kinda my plan, except to wish him a happy birthday. I told him when he left that I want to know where our relationship stands because I want to make sure Im waiting for the right reasons. I just hope that I still am. Ive never done this whole deployment thing before, so its all new to me. This is his third time over there, so I dont know if this is normal for him. It just makes me question if I can do this.