Today I did the toughest thing I think I've ever had to do. I had to say good-bye to my sailor. He left for his deployment. Its his second one, but the first one that I've been through. The day was not that bad, me and a friend who's husband is onboard my husbands ship spent the day together, I was fine until I came home and I just fell apart. I've got to find a way to deal with all of this. If you ladies have any advice at all it would be greatly appricated. I dont' know what to do now, my best friend is gone and all I can do is cry. :unlove :tears

I am sorry sweetie! I don't really know what to tell you because Nick doesn't leave for his 1st six month until January. Two of Nick's friends left on the Eisenhower with that group of ships. The only advice I have is probably what you hear all the time...stay busy! This site works wonders for taking up time :)

It's totally normal to feel sad and a little lost the first few days. Just let yourself have those feelings. Cry as much as you need to and then in a few days, pick yourself up and start living life again. You'll have more days where you're feeling crappy about it (kind of like I do today), but just remember that each day that passes is one day closer to HIM!! Whoo hoo! You'll be okay, I'm sure. We're all here for ya.:hugs :hugs :hugs

Take time to let yourself mourn him being gone-let yourself cry & feel what you are feeling-DO NOT try to cover your real feelings-Once you get it out, you can work on moving forward & moving on and looking forward to HOMECOMING! Good luck, Keep your chin up, stay strong & we are always here if you need us:goodvibes :hugs :wink

stay busy with a job, volunteering or hobbies etc...
That is the best advise ever

I think is just something we have to go through. You will go through every single stages of deployment, the pain of separation, the anxiety of just wanting him back now and the joy of preparing for homecoming. All of those no matter what you do you will have to go through them. What has help me tremendously is try to meet with the girls, taking classes of things that I enjoy doing (crafts) and now planing for homecoming. Write him letters, if you have a digital camera or camcorder where you could record your self and surrounds do so and send it to him (I've had sooo much fun doing this) It's normal to cry from time to time but do not allow your self to stay down. It's tough but we are here to help you go through it.

I am going through my first deployment. The night I said goodbye to DH i was fine until i got to the hotel room. I just lost it. I had days were i would be great and others were I could barely think about him without crying. But it passed. It gets a little easier (or so i have been told). Like the other ladies said just keep yourself busy. If you need anything we are here for you! :hugs

Let it out girl. First is always the hardest. First two weeks suck. Get your support system together and get busy. That's the quickest way to pass the time. Find a hobby. I prefer trial and error, you may not be particularly interested in that floral arrangement class, but it'll pass the time. LOL.

Oh and I call my mommy and she lets me whine for a while. Chin up girl. You'll get through it.

Get all the crying out and just be upset that he's gone at first, then find things to keep you busy.. make a list of goals, not big ones just little ones to mark different parts of the deployment being completed. You will be able to go through your own little schedule that way and you will get more and more excited as you get things done and cross them off your list rather than just count down days! That's what I did and before I knew it, there were only 3 weeks left of the deployment and I was down to the wire on a BUNCH of different things! Working out helped A LOT for me as well! It got all the nervous frustration out of me and helped me sleep at night because I was just so tired! This site helped monopolize a lot of my time as well! LOL!!!

The one thing in military life is that you have to have "your own" life. Make sure that during this deployment you focus on you. So many times while our loved ones are at home we focus on them. This is your time. Do things for yourself that you haev always wanted to do but never got around to doing. Pamper yourself!!!!!!

There are days when you want to stay under the covers and never see the world and then there are days that you want to run naked through the streets. Keep in your mind and your heart that your best friend is not GONE. Don't use those words. Use he is on a mission, he is protecting me out there, he is doing a temporary assignment.

You have to have the faith and the strenght in your love. You have to be strong for him out there. You don't want him to worry about you out there, he has to focus on his duty or people get hurt. You have to support him in all ways. There are going to be bad days for him and he will take it out on you, you have to understand.

He will miss you more then you miss him!!!!!!! You still lay your head on the pillow at night in your house and have all the comfort of home, he does not. Send those care packages, and plan them.

Keep busy and the time does go by. Everyday it will get a little better for you and there is always a support system for you through us here.

Good luck and you will make it through this!!

:hugs Just keep your self busy. Start a new hobby or plan a project or something. Anything that keeps you from sitting in the house just wallowing in missing him. Remember though that you will have your days like the rest of us do and those are ok to have also.