ok so ladies out there that are planning a wedding or who are already married i would like your advice. df and i have talked about doing a small justice of the peace thing, both of us have looked into cost, time restraints, etc etc and it doesn't sound bad...we could still have the small, elegant/classy, wedding we want. we didn't want anything big, the wedding isn't about how much money can we spend and how extravagant can we be (We can't afford it), it is about saying I Do and starting our lives together. He's looked at how fast he can get into base housing if he chooses to stay in SC for the last part of school (he's in power now he just has prototype left and they gave him the option if he wants to move or not). Me and him have discussed what I would do about school. I'd essentially finish up the last semester after we got married here or if the application deadline had passed before we decided anything then i'd move there and work or get the prereqs that i'd need because of the possibility that i would lose some.
sorry for the big lead up, so i guess my question is....
would ya'll do or wish you had done a justice of the peace ceromony and then wait till he got out/ya'll afford a "real" wedding? I"m confused...me and df are going to discuss it more when i go up in april i was just wondering ya'll's opinions.

oh and if ya'll have any horror stories of planning the wedding around his deployment schedule, leave, etc can you let me know so if we don't decide to do the JoP I have some idea of what to expect. thanks in advance

I had the BIG traditional Church wedding. I paid for the entire thing. Looking back now dh and say we should have just eloped and saved the money.
I still would have gotten the "perfect" dress and a Photographer for sure.
We did a vow renewal in 04 down in the Bahamas and it was perfect!

Oh and while planning our wedding my dh was on PAC. He came home and we got married less than a month later. Thankfully we didn't really have to pay any deposits except for the reception. So had something happened we would have been ok.
So my suggestion is DO WHAT YOU GUYS and screw everybody else.
That is what made us rethink.

I did the justice of peace thing w/ my first marriage...I won't do it again.

I want a traditional wedding this time around...but that is just MY preference. There are some here who have done the court house thing and are happy with that.

yeah we would have a photographer and a reception and all that. the dress and flower girls and guests it would be like we just go to a 24hr chapel and get married. our families being there is the most important thing and then we'd renew our vows or whatever and have a big ceromony when he got out

Sounds like it's more than just skipping to the courthouse to hurry up :) Sounds good!

:-) we are going to discuss it more in april when i go see him in SC. he's checked out how long it'd be for base housing and everything and it wouldn't be too long of a wait if a wait at all.

sc is no wait for housing
we got straight in when we moved there and it has been like that forever

We did the justice of the peace thing but we're doing a traditional wedding next year.

My husband and I were married by JP in a funeral home lol. then a couple months later my mom had a wedding for us.

had the best of both worlds. We went to Lake Tahoe, and got married in a chapel. We had a package that was like $750, and it included pics, and a video, and music, and the place, it was nice. My mom bought my dress and she paid for my makeup and hair. Overall, we didn't spend very much, but we have the pretty pics and the dress and all that. It was wonderful, and I would never want to plan an actual wedding...It is one day out of our lives, and I didn't want to start off in debt. KWIM? I don't have the desire for a big wedding, and I never would have regretted not having one, but if you think you will, you should probably go for it...

We are doing both. In April we are doing the JP thing. Then in June we are having a wedding with all our family and friends.

we did JOP because we just wanted to be together. We had a "wedding" after. the important thing for us was to be married and start our life together. How we got there didn't matter.

we did JOP because we just wanted to be together. We had a "wedding" after. the important thing for us was to be married and start our life together. How we got there didn't matter.

that's how we feel. me and him are talking it through simply because i asked him flat out that he needs to make a decision regarding when he wants me to move. when he goes to prototype or when he gets his orders at the end of this year because i'd have to apply to a new school. he said he wants me to be with him (and i told him i want to be with him too) whereever he is. we are talking about doing a small thing at my church with my priest, and the reception there and the chapel isntead of the big church. we are gonna discuss it tonight when he gets home from school and then talk about it with our families...our own and the future in-laws. he's really worried that for some reason i'm not going to have the wedding of my dreams. i told him i don't want a spectacle of look how much money i can spend or look how many things i have at my reception...i just want to be his wife, start my life with him, etc etc.
i'll keep ya'll updated definitely

Hey girl! Sounds like you two pretty much have your minds set on what you want! I think that's ultimately all that matters! I know how crazy you are to be able to be with him finally and it's a good time for you if you are almost finished or finished completely with school! You know what you're doing and you two know what you want! Don't worry about everyone else and whether or not someone's feelings will get hurt. It's you guys wedding not theirs, and they will get over it!!! We haven't talked in a while either! IM me tonight sometime if you get a chance!

We are hoping to do a JP Quickie before deployment and then plan a BIG wedding when he gets home and we can actually plan something. He didn't have the kind of wedding he wanted with his first marriage so Im hoping to have that for him. I had a BIG wedding so it really doesn't matter to me but I really want to give him something that he wanted.

I was torn by how to go about doing this because of his deployment and some of the other wives said they did it this way and that they celebrate their anniversary on the day of their BIG wedding. Im gonna celebrate BOTH!!! They are going to be equally important to me!!! :D

Df and I planned on doing the JOP thing before he left for Deployment but it didn't end up happening with all the stress and time constaints of a first deployment, we really wish we would have though, we are going to do a JOP wedding as soon as he gets back, and plan a BIG wedding for our first anniversary that way it is still the same date :) Basically it all comes down to what the two of you want, it is your lives, and no one elses, so in the end you should do what will make both of you the happiest, if that is eloping with no one but the two of you, so be it, if that's having the biggest wedding in the world, then go for it. My advice....follow your heart, it won't steer you wrong.

thanks everyone. we are discussing it tomorrow night and making a decision.

I did a elopment in vegas for my first marriage. HORRIBLE idea

Then last year we did a JOP kinda thing. Got the license then went to a park and got married with my mom and the kids there no one else.

I wouldn't change my wedding day for anything. We both dressed nice, it was beautiful, sunny, warm, the roses were in bloom, I didn't stress about people coming or money. Of course I would love to have a huge wedding for a renewal kinda of thing but my last wedding was just perfect in my eyes. Less stress is the best.

me and df are doing the JoP Like next week so we can get stuff in and done before he leaves for deployment and then while he's gone i'm gonna be planning a big wedding , well im in the process of doing it now but ill really be gettin stuff done alot more when i know more about when he's comein back.