I love DB with all my heart and we've been together almost 2 years...but... I get the feeling I'm going to wind up waiting probably another 4-7 years for DB and I get as much as engaged. and I'm sorry but my clock is ticking and I don't know if I'd wait years and years on end without no movement in a positive direction on his part.

Anyone else have/ever had a guy who is slow to committing in that sense?

DH was ready to get married a few months later...lol which wasn't probable as I was a freshman and he was a senior in high school. We got engaged (9-11-04) 3 years later when I was in the middle my last semester of HS (I graduated a semester early) and we were married (12-19-04) 2 days after my semester ended.

Hopefully you will get there soon though if that is what you are both wanting. :D

I thought that was gonna be me, waiting as JUST his girlfriend untill he got outta the Military or w/e.. Which KILLED me to think that b/c the Military wouldn't ever give a rats ass about me, & I wouldn't know right away if something were to ever happen to him, & I do NOT like that idea.

But I was pleasently suprised that he did it so soon. He is VERY good @ hiding suprises from me.


I hope you get it soon enough though!

Thanks girls... I appreciate that.

I'm to a point though with me fixing to go off to basic in the next few months that as much as I love him I'm not gonna sit around and wait and I'm just gonna keep myself so busy that I won't have time to care.

I feel ya girlie! we have been together for a year and a half( frinds for 3)
and sometimes it feels like it will be a while longer! I think its they way he talkes that makes me think that way......hang in there! Sometimes they have stuff up there sleeves and dont let on to it!

things are kind of like that with my guy... he says he's not a "commitophobe" hes just a marriage-o-phobe... great... what does that mean?

he says one day....?

I had that feeling a few times in the beginning but recently he's been wanting to talk more about it, and he sort of gave me a time frame as to when it will happen. Just give it some more time and if the time is right, then it'll happen.

girl i totally know what you mean i was pretty sure it was all me and that i'd be waiting forever, but once he got all used to and settled in with the navy he wanted to marry me, like right away!! i was so shocked but yah just hang in there he'll figure out whats important...you:D

I have been in your shoes. I was with my ex Dave for 9 years. He knew I wanted to get married and have kids. He told me he was afraid of having kids. I thought I would be able to help him with that. Well after living with him for 4 years and going through a depression, last year around this time I told him that we had to be done. He told me that he didn't give me any other choice. I was seeing someone in the Navy and things ended up not working out.

I'm now with someone who is aware of what my goals are. We have only dated for about a month and a half. I think we are actually going to be talking about marriage and kids this weekend. I'm nervous as to how this is going to go but I know it needs to be done. We are both in our mid to late 30's. Hopefully it will go good or I will have to end it with him.

Stay Strong!!!!

Lori

Yes, im totally with you on this one, its like hes scared or something, but i dont get it when he sais how much he loves me and wants to be with me for as long as possible..iuno..it also might be that hes only 19 and that his dad is putting "dont get married" ideas in his head..sucks..

My DF was that way...boot camp straightened him right out!! :giggle

I cant say I've been there, but if you have a feeling that nothing is going to happen anytime soon and he's think not for a couple of years, I'd give him an altematum. Hang in there.

I was in your place!!! My husband and I are high school sweethearts. We only got married last year 2006, but before that we dated for 9 years. Right after he graduated high school he left for boot camp, I was still a senior in school. After basic and OSUT he went on to his duty station, then he ended up going to Iraq for 13 months. This all happened within about 3 years, we were in a long distance relationship for 4 years. After he came back to the states from his deployment I thought for sure he was going to ask me to marry him. I was wrong, he knew I wanted to get married! But, he wasn't ready, so I didn't push him. Sometimes it was very hard just being the GF who was in Pennsylvania while he is stationed in Louisiana. But, we did the long distance relationship for 4 years and worked through the circumstances that made this relationship a little harder. He came home from the Army and we got married!! I couldn't be happier now with our decision. We both grew up so much and learned so much about life and each while we were apart. We appreciate each other so much more now. We knew when it was time to get married and that was after he was home from the Army. I felt the whole 4 years that I was missing out on so much, and in a sense I was. But, we grew from that and made our relationship even more special when we got to spend time together.

Long distance relationships aren't easy, BUT, they are what you make of them. They require extra work, but every second in the end is so much appreciated. Your relationship will be so much stronger if you know you will both wait for each other. You will have a super strong relationship. You have to make them work, but if it's what you both want, the work is fun. Don't give up because you see 4-7 years as such a long time, let it be a learning experience. I will not lie, it will be hard, but it is also very rewarding. Just let things happen as they happen, you both want to be happy with the decision.

Don't rush it!!!!! It's ok just to be a "girlfriend" or "fiance". I rushed it at 20. I got what I wanted....The ring, the princess wedding, etc. but it ended up being all with the wrong guy!!! Now at 26....I'm divorced! But lucky....I have found the one I should have waited for! And luckily he doesn't haven't a problem with marriage or kids. Hang in there....if it's meant to be....it will happen! :hugs