Ok so I need some advice. Me and my husband have been together for almost three years now. I had a child from aprevious relationship who was only 6 months old when he met my husband. My husband takes full responsibility for him and now we have a chld together who was a year on halloween. So my husband is leaving for bootcamp in march and then going straight to BUDS. He and I talked about it and decided that the kids and I would go live with him while he was in BUDS so he wouldn't be apart from the kids for so long.
The first year or two of our reltionship had some rocky times since the situation was difficult. He came into an already formed family. But we came past all our problems. SO now my family doesn't want me and the kids to go with my husband. I just can't see how I can keep the kids from their dad for the rest of the time he's in the military which he was planning to go the full 20 years. I am so close to my family and I hate that they are trying to make me feel so guilty I dont think its fair. I dont want to hurt them or take the kids far away from them but I have to. I am so torn. They won't even talk about this with me anymore.
Has anyone else gone through this? Its so difficult. We were away from my dad when I was younger so he could work out of state and I hated not seeing my dad. I dont want my kids to have the same thing in their life. Plus I can come and visit them often and obviously talk to them all the time. I need help. I just don't know how to handle this whole mess.
Thanks you guys!

It is really important for you and your children to be near your husband. Your family in time will understand. At first they may not accept it but you know what is best for your family. Like you said, you will be able to talk to them all the time and see them as often as you want.:hugehug

I agree, it's important to be with your husband. Even though your family may miss you....your husband it your family now and so are your children. I'm sure that after talking with them, your family will understand.

:hugs

Thanks you guys. I mean I'm scared enough on my own. I have never really left my hometown otehr than for a vacation. I just wish I had a little more support right now. But thanks alot you guys really. I feel better now knowing that I'm doing the right thing!

Your family now is your husband and your children. It's time to move on from your parents. They raised you, gave you roots and wings! It's time to spread those wings and go out and do what is best for you and your family.

You need to be with your hubby, especially if he is going to go through BUD/s, he is going to need all your support and energy... you can not be worried about your family.
It will be okay. I moved here to San Diego from Canada to be with my hubby for BUD/s. Was it scary... YES!!! Did my family try and talk me out of it.... YES!!! Do I regret it... NO!!! My home is where my hubby is. My children love their daddy and enjoy even the small amount of time with him.
Good Luck to you and remember, we are here for you!

I'm in the same boat as you honey. I plan on moving to Cali with Chris next Jan once he gets settled back home from cruise. My dad and stepmom are VERY against it and my dad has said that if I were to move my stepmom would never talk to me again. To me thats a bit extream. For one, he is your husband and you have a family now. You need to be there for your husband. I know how it feels for the family to give you the shitty guilt trip, but you have to just let it roll off your back. If you have ANY reservations at all, then reconsider joining him, otherwise its time to have a life of your own and your own family.

Girl, PM me if you ever want to talk. I KNOW what you're going though. Hang in there.

Your family now is your husband and your children. It's time to move on from your parents. They raised you, gave you roots and wings! It's time to spread those wings and go out and do what is best for you and your family.

I totally agree with this. As much as you love your family, you've created a new family with your husband. It would be great for your kids, I'm sure, if they could live with their dad and also live near their grandparents, but, if it's one or the other, they should really be with their father, and you should be with your husband. Your family will have to get over it, it's more important to keep your family together and support him.