Okay, Over a year ago i found out i was pregnant. It was at that moment (even before that moment) that this was the last one. My pregnancies are very hard and cause more harm to my body. I have all ready lost a child and i almost lost Savannah. But about a year ago Jesse said he would get snipped because it was easier for him to do so than me going through surgery. I agreed. Jesse and I then went through ups and downs with the pregnancy. Jesse kept saying he was gunna get snipped. Well towards the end of the pregnancy i talked to my OB which said that he would do a tuble on me if we did a c-section. I said i wanted it because i had a feeling Jesse was never going to follow through. Heck it had all ready been 7 months and he hasn't even talked to the doctor about it. My OB said he would do it and then i went into labor the next week. I had an emergency c-section at a different hospital and the doctors refused to do it due to me not having the paperwork signed. So i didn't get it done. Jesse said once again that he would go get snipped and i didn't have to worry about it.
Well Savannah is almost 8 months old and at least 4 times a week i have said something to jesse about getting snipped. I have all ready misscarried after savannah and i can't go through any of this again. Jesse has seen the doc and gone to the class now all he has to do is make the apt but hasn't. It's been almost two months since the class and i have mentioned it almost every day. Even his parents have been on his case.
He just keeps telling me he'll call tomorrow or he'll do it tomorrow.
I don't think he cares if i get pregnant. In fact i don't think he cares about anyone but himself these days. And i'm through with hearing myself talk to obviously thin air.

what should i do? I can't just ignore this and possibly get pregnant again. My OB told me "YOU CAN'T GET PREGNANT OR YOU WILL PROBABLY DIE" think i should make an appointment for myself for surgery?
BTW, i have with held sex and it truely hurts to say this but... He seems just fine with it.

The pill? IUD? Diaprham? Shot?

Yes, you should make the appt for yourself and just take care of it. And while you are at it really look at the fact that you are having to do this because your husband obviously has a complete disregard for you and your safety or he would have taken care of getting a vasectomy the first time you two decided to do it.
I'm really sorry that you are even having to deal with this situation.. :hugs

i would go and get it done. you have to look after YOUR health cause he isnt thinking about it. your kids need you to be around.

could you do an iud or something. i would just go get a tubel! you can't have anymore so why keep the goods in working order you know. i say go for it!!! its a health issue not to in my opinion

I would make the appt. it is not about him at this point is about you and your health and makeing sure that you are going to be there for your kids that you already have.

I can't do the iud because of my cervix and because of my heart i can't take the pill. and i got pregnant with all three of my kids while on birth control and condoms. HA! He can't use them. Not going into great detail on why.

The mini pill? Spermicide?

I can't do the iud because of my cervix and because of my heart i can't take the pill. and i got pregnant with all three of my kids while on birth control and condoms. HA! He can't use them. Not going into great detail on why.

make the appt.... just keep in the back of your head what happened to me! you guys are better off if gets snipped, but it doesnt look like that is going to happen. i would go and do yours and keep pushing him to get snipped as well. you can never be too careful!:wink

There are lots of birth control methods out there. I'm sure you could find one that worked for you and your body. If not then I think I'd get myself fixed.

make the appt.... just keep in the back of your head what happened to me! you guys are better off if gets snipped, but it doesnt look like that is going to happen. i would go and do yours and keep pushing him to get snipped as well. you can never be too careful!:wink

I agree. And if you need any help while you're at the hospital etc for that just let me know.

I'd make myself an appointment to get myself fixed and then beat his ass for being so thoughtless

Honestly, I would get myself fixed.

Unfotunately you are going to have to make the appt yourself because your husband is being irresponsible about all of this.

I would get the operation. I think you shouldn't wait and put your life in danger because of his selfish laziness. Your children need you to be around and that's that. Im sorry he is being such an insensitive dick to you. Do it for yourself hun.

Can you just figure out a day when he will be off and make the damn appointment for him lol. Then tell him that you made it and he has to be there by a certain time. If not then do as the other ladies said and get yourself fixed. :hugs I'm sorry he is being such a pain though. :(

If it was me I would just take care of myself and get the tubes tied.

Good Luck I would say make an appointment. I hope maybe seeing you go he will make his appointment.

Yes, you should make the appt for yourself and just take care of it. And while you are at it really look at the fact that you are having to do this because your husband obviously has a complete disregard for you and your safety or he would have taken care of getting a vasectomy the first time you two decided to do it.
I'm really sorry that you are even having to deal with this situation.. :hugs

:yes

I would just get my tubes tied and not wait on him any more. I know here at Bremerton you would go in and out of the hospital the same day. I will be getting mine tied after I have this baby.

Make the appointment. My DH has been trying to get snipped for over a year, they keep giving him the run-around due to age, blah blah blah. So now they said ok, but he has to do the class and counceling and what not, and I just know he's not going to do it...so I already signed the paperwork in case I need a c-section, and if not I'm just going to have it done post-partum.
Unfortunately, I can't trust DH to actually go and get it done, and I can't afford another pregnancy after this baby (I've been high-risk for all of them, and I really can't put my body through another again).

Good luck hun, I'd definately just go and get it set up. Maybe that will get him to do his, then you'll be double-safe.

If you will have help (either from family or friends, someone other than your hubby for Savannah post-op,) I would go ahead and do it yourself. It doesn't really sound like he wants to have it done, even though it's a much less invasive procedure for HIM than for you, but I know some men are just squeamish about it. Josh is like that too, so I'm sure I"ll have to bug him about getting it done too in a few years.

Is it possible for you to get an IUD in?

:hugs I hope he follows through!

Can you just make an appointment for him?
Make an appointment and get the operation yourself. If its a life or death situation I don't see what the question is.

I'd make an appointment for the surgery, especially since getting pregnant again is a health risk for you. Have you talked to your doctor about going ahead and doing a hysterectomy instead of a tubal b/c of the health risk? Hope you get something figured out soon. :hugs

#1 - You need to take care of you, get a tubal, or hysterectomy if that's actually better for you.

#2 - You have other issues IMO if he won't do this for you and your health. That needs to be addressed, even if you do go ahead and get a tubal.

Good luck.

I bet he's scared, but who cares! I agree, he's being selfish, even if that is the reason.

Goodluck w/ deciding :hugs

With as high risk as you are, I'd get my tubes tied AND make an appt for him to get snipped. Since the possibility of ever having another child isn't there due to health issues, you don't have to worry about the common things like wanting them reversed later (if that was the case, obviously I don't think BOTH partners getting fixed is a good idea). Since you are so incredibly high risk though and you KNOW you can't have another one, I'd make him the appt and also make one for yourself to be fixed. I was going to suggest IUD because they have some that have no hormones at all (the copper IUD) but if that isn't an option, I'd definitely get fixed.

I'd go get fixed and then you two need to sit down and have a serious talk. He's being incredibly selfish right now. IMO

See if you can make the appt for him. I know it is different at every base but I made the appt for dh and no one said a word.

Get a tubal... It really is not all that bad.