We are trying to decide if I'm going to be a stay at home mom when our baby gets here or if I'm going to continue to work. I love my job...it's what I went to college to do. I've been in my position for two years now and have really settled in.

We tried for this baby for over a year. Having this baby is the greatest blessing ever and I cannot wait to be a Mommy. I feel as though I should stay home with him and nurture him for the first few years of his life.

I get conflicting advice. Some friends think I am crazy for wanting to give up my career to stay at home. Most of my family thinks staying home would be wonderful. Dh wants me to stay home with the baby, but will support me if I choose to go back to work.

I guess I'm just asking for some advice and experiences with working v/s staying home. It's a tough decision!

I worked before having kids and stopped when we got pregnant. We tried for 9.5 years for our first and I was not going to do the daycare thing. Plus the way we figured it I would be paying so much for childcare it really wasnt worth it (to us)

After being a SAHM for over 2 years now I can tell you I LOVE it. It is the most challenging and rewarding thing I have ever done. My children are only young once and this time is so important to me and I feel very blessed that I am able to stay home, be here for them, teach them, see their accomplishments etc

Now that being said I dont have anything against those who choose to work. I think thats great. But for us, me staying home, is the best thing for our family and I truly love it

My experience.. It hurts worse then anything when you child calls you by his daycare provider's name...

And it sucks because your kid will be exposed to 10 times as many virius' so you'll have to call in sick to care for him anyways...

Not to mention the cost of the daycare, you also have to figure in the cost of your gas and insurance, taxes, work clothes, lunches... And when your baby gets bit by another child for the first time... And hearing him BAWL everyday when you drop him off because he wants to be with mom...

I'm anti-daycare in case you couldn't tell.. I'm NEVER going to do it again.. I think the best caregiver for a child is the parent..

I knew I wanted to be a SAHM if I wanted kids. For me, I'm selfish but I want to see eveything my kids do and I want to be the one who is there for them and cook their meals and greet them when they wake up from naps, etc.

I come from a family where you just MUST have a master's degree and have a career, but it was not for me. Call me old fashioned but I LOVE having a warm meal ready for my husband when he comes home from work and I love being the one who does the household thing. I LOVE it!!!

But, to each his own. Make a list and see what works best for YOU and YOUR family and good luck with your decision! ;)

I hope that once I have kids I will be financially able to stay home while they are young. I do know that once they are older I will go back to work, but I have always always wanted to be a mom, and stay home to raise my kids. My mom worked full time when we were growing up, and I was always jealous of the kids who had moms pick them up after school and volunteer in the classroom etc. I always told myself that if I could I would stay home. I work hard now, I have my degree, and am proud of my accomplishments thus far. Hopefully I can keep saving so that when we are ready for kids I can stay home. If not I'll work and it will be okay too...

Well I look at it like this. You can ALWAYS go back to your career, but you can never do those first few years over ;)

I REALLY hope that I'll be able to continue staying home with Preston once Chad gets home. Money will be tight, but hopefully I can do it.

I've always wanted to be a stay at home wife/mom. That's just what I always saw myself doing. When I was younger I had this whole Dr. dream and all, but when I got older and really started thinking about where I wanted my life to go, I just knew I would be more than happy if I had my hubby and a few kids to take care of. I'm one of those needs to be needed type of people. It's genetic because my Granny is the same way.

That being said I am going to school to get a nursing degree. I want to have a back up plan if anything ever happens to Dh or he is hurt and cannot work (same situation my parents are in). I want to be able to provide if necessary.

I like the idea of kids being able to socialize and play with each other, but I want to be the one home to hear my childrens' first words and watch them grow up and be there to teach them things. Day care isn't cheap and like some of the other ladies have said missing out on things at home and having to pay more for someone else to care for my child just aren't what I have in mind as ideal! LOL!! Everyone is different though.

You love your job and if you want to continue maybe see if they would let you work part time or take a long leave of absence and see if maybe after a while you could come back and do the same job or be put in another position at the same company. If you leave on good terms the likelihood of being able to work there again are really high.

It's up to you though and I have nothing to say about parents who do either or. LOL! The way your family works may be TOTALLY different from anyone elses but I wish you luck in your decision!!! :hugs

My experience.. It hurts worse then anything when you child calls you by his daycare provider's name...

And it sucks because your kid will be exposed to 10 times as many virius' so you'll have to call in sick to care for him anyways...

Not to mention the cost of the daycare, you also have to figure in the cost of your gas and insurance, taxes, work clothes, lunches... And when your baby gets bit by another child for the first time... And hearing him BAWL everyday when you drop him off because he wants to be with mom...

I'm anti-daycare in case you couldn't tell.. I'm NEVER going to do it again.. I think the best caregiver for a child is the parent..

Here Here:chest

Well I look at it like this. You can ALWAYS go back to your career, but you can never do those first few years over

This is EXACTLY why I want to stay home.

I battled with this decision as well. I got pregnant my senior year of college and had my son shortly after graduation. I stayed home with him for a year, then made a choice to work because I felt like I was losing everything I learned and some days I totally regret it. My son has been sick SO MUCH, that's a downside. Also, just the feeling of leaving him in someone else's care is SO HARD. Other days I'm grateful that he's learning, socializing, sharing, etc. with other kids. But, I'm going to ttc another soon and then I will be staying home. The daycare costs would take my ENTIRE check and I just dont' want to go through the heartbreak of leaving a baby again. When they go to school, I'll go back to work. I hope you go with your heart and make the decision that's right for you.

Well I look at it like this. You can ALWAYS go back to your career, but you can never do those first few years over ;)

:yes I agree, I stopped working for a full year after I had Ryan and after he turned 1 y/o I decided I wanted to go back to work, I had no problems with getting a job in the same field as before. I was very blessed to be able to spend the first year of my son's life with him. Good luck!

:yes I agree, I stopped working for a full year after I had Ryan and after he turned 1 y/o I decided I wanted to go back to work, I had no problems with getting a job in the same field as before. I was very blessed to be able to spend the first year of my son's life with him. Good luck!

I agree. Just because you take some time off does not mean your brain is going to turn to mush. I understand moms that HAVE to return to work but the moms that WANT to return right after the birth, I always wonder what was the point of having a baby? YKWIM?

If you are financially able to stay home with your child DO IT!

Well I look at it like this. You can ALWAYS go back to your career, but you can never do those first few years over ;)

I totally agree!

Wait until the baby is here and then decide. I know a lady who had her first baby when she was 30 (I think she was at least, around that). She had a great job, the job she'd always wanted to have and had planned to go back to work. But when it came time for her to go back to work she decided that she wanted to stay home with her son instead. It was really a last minute decision for her.

I thought about going back to work after E arrived, when I was still preggo with him. After he was born, there was NOOOOOO way I'd be able to work getting only like 3 hours of total broken-up sleep. Ethan wasn't the type of baby who automatically slept through the night. He didn't start sleeping through the night til he was 6 months old. I'm so glad I made the choice of becoming a SAHM. I think I would be so heartbroken if *I* missed E's first milestones. I'd rather have Bryan witness those first milestones first-hand, than the daycare provider...

I went back to work 3 months after having my daughter and not because i had to. I went because i wanted to continue the career i started. And to answer someone's thought, just because i went back to work because i wanted to, doesn't mean i don't love and care for my daughter or do not deserve to be a mom.

There is an impact on your career when you leave work for a while. Of course it all depends on your what your career is and how far your want to go. my daughter is very happy and she's well cared for in daycare. No question, it is hard. there are sacrifices to be made on both ends. But, both DH and I wanted our careers. I need that for myself. There is nothing wrong with wanting to keep at your career and continuing to work hard at it. It is just a decision you have to make for yourself. Make sure you take your time to make that decision after the birth too.

good luck.

eta: dd is 1 now and i have yet to miss a milestone, even though i work.

I am torn as well...I want to stay at home because I want to spend all my time with Bri but then again I know we would be better off and be able to buy more things and do alot more fun stuff if I did work.