Yesterday my ex left for bootcamp. We have a very long and complicated history, but, basically about 3 weeks ago (after being separated for 2 months) he said that he cared about me, and wanted to be with me, but just not while he was in bootcamp/training. So, I said okay, gave him his space, and a week later he asked me to be with him anyways. I said yes and we've spent the last two weeks together.

The thing is, he's been a complete JERK to me. He hardly touched me, or kissed me, or anything like that.

Then, yesterday morning, he dumped me and said that he wanted to be single during bootcamp. In the morning, he said, "when I get done from bootcamp, we can talk about starting a relationship then." After having a really good time together during the morning, about three hours later he told me that being with me was a mistake and that he never wanted to be with me again. He almost wasn't going to write me, but, his kind-of sister made him promise that he would. He doesn't even have my address.... or a picture of me... and so the letters that he's sending to me are going to go to his mothers house.

I feel so hurt. I've been supporting him and rooting him on... and all he can do is be a jerk.

Why is he pushing me away like this? I had planned on writing him letters everyday, and he had told me that he wanted me to before he dumped me... but now I don't know.

What should I do? I love this man with all of my heart, and this kills me.

Being as neutrak as possible, I think he may just be pushing you away, because he's afraid he may loose you anyway. give him his space, and as cliche as it is "if you love someone, you gotta let him go". If you two are meant to be together, it will happen.

boot is hard and he may not be willing to hurt so much thinking about what you are doing with out him. if he doesn't want you to contact him, don't. i would write the letters and keep them, for when he does come back and he can see what you were feelin.

Good luck hun :hugs.

And btw, Welcome to sos!!

He never specifically said whether he wanted me to write him or not.

The tough thing is, three months ago he moved to Montana, while I live in Washington... so his 10 days off after boot camp will be spent in Montana.

This is just so hard. *sigh*

My husband and I do the same things to one another. Before he leaves for a Patrol we will push one another away, argue like crazy!
He may just be trying to see if you'll be waiting for him.
I'd write him at least a couple of times..they get so lonely at bootcamp!

Write him once or twice but i would just basically wait it out. See what happens when he gets home on leave and talk to him then. I'm sorry he's putting you through this. Boot Camp is hard on our guys, you have to understand that. I wish you luck!!

Welcome to SOS, by the way.

Just relax, my husband does this to me every time he leaves for some military thing. Men are strange like that, just try to take it easy and take it one day at a time, everything will work out. Hang in there hon.

My husband and I do the same things to one another. Before he leaves for a Patrol we will push one another away, argue like crazy!
He may just be trying to see if you'll be waiting for him.
I'd write him at least a couple of times..they get so lonely at bootcamp!

:agree DB and I fought like CRAZY before he deployed and I was so miserable. He even mentioned breaking up-which we said we are never doing again...long story...But I agree, he might just be scared of losing you anyway so he just wants to protect himself from getting hurt. Plus bootcamp is stressful and hard on them...so do write him a couple of times and see how things turn out after bootcamp. :hugs :hugs