dont know what to do? his deplyment isnt till february but im still scared. he still has pre-deployment to finish.

I always say stay busy & stay positive:yes:hugs

I always say stay busy & stay positive:yes:hugs

:agree (although some days, the "positive" part is hard to come by) we had both our girls when Dh was on shore duty so when he started going back out to sea i had a 2 yr old and a 6 mo old. online sites (like here, livejournal, yahoo groups) helped me a lot as far as "adult interaction". do you have any friends with kids around the same age? that's another way to get some adult time and the kids can entertain each other lol. plus, you guys can swap babysitting duties if you have appts and stuff.

if you don't know too many people where you are, you might want to check yahoo groups or something similar. maybe you can find a mom's group or playgroup.

:goodluck :hugehug

I have to try and stay positive for my sons sake. No i dont know anyone in my area i just moved here so all my family is back in az. thank you for the advice though every little thing helps

THis is our first deployment with kids. We did 3 before and I thought it would be easier with children. Its a bittersweet mix. Some days it really is because I dont dwell on him, but others...the days they are making leaps and bounds and just the cute things they do, those are worse then any day in any single deployment. I just put myself into my kids. Concentrating on them really helped me. It took me about 2 months to get used to not having the extra help and getting a really good grove down when I left the house (I have a 2 year old and a 10 month old) but after a while it just came naturally like everything else. Just take lots of pictures and video for him so he doesn't feel like he missed as much.

This is my first with a kid and it waaaaaay harder then it was when I was by myself. I do belong to a playgroup and it does help a lot to break the monotony. Try not to stress and find a good friend to swap kids with.

I am a first time deployment gal and I have a small son. I don't have family around either. I have my down days, but I work full time and my weeks just fly by. I stay so busy with work and my son that it has really been going quickly.
If you ever want to talk just PM me or IM me.

You have to stay busy.. I have 2 kids who are 3 & 1 and i plan a week of things to do.. from going to the beach to having a water fight.. Just remember its going to be hard on your kiddo so you have to keep your head up.. Also a thing for you kiddo to help them get through is a daddy doll. (www.daddydoll.com) I got one for my daughter and she LOVES and she can take daddy where ever we go.. she sleeps with it she rough houses with it but most of all she can be close to him!

You have to stay busy.. I have 2 kids who are 3 & 1 and i plan a week of things to do.. from going to the beach to having a water fight.. Just remember its going to be hard on your kiddo so you have to keep your head up.. Also a thing for you kiddo to help them get through is a daddy doll. (www.daddydoll.com) I got one for my daughter and she LOVES and she can take daddy where ever we go.. she sleeps with it she rough houses with it but most of all she can be close to him!

Sorry its Daddydolls.com

Yep, stay busy! Remember, one day that he's gone is one day that he's closer to him coming home. It was hard because we were only married 2 weeks before he left. Every night I would have email a little note to him from the baby. I kept his picture up so she knew. And I kept busy.

Stay as positive as you possibly can :hugs :hugs

we have two boys and we have been on shore duty for the last 3.5 years so this upcoming deployment is going to take its toll on my boys, but my suggestion is stay busy. either in the FRG or in the community, play groups are great. i will be volunteering at the boys school since my DH will be gone during the holidays i want to go to home for them, i can't look for work and then be like OH yeah i need 2 weeks off during the holidays! and then again in june for my brothers wedding. i always count the paydays too. instead of the weeks.

My Dh is having a deployment coming up soon and it will of course be our first with baby..I am nervous as well.

it is a first time deployment for me too. i have 3 girls ages 6,5,and2 and it is hard as hell. right now he is training and we can talk or use the webcam but when he goes overseas i am panicstricken. i have recorded him reading the kids a goodnite story, they each got a build a bear with his voice inside telling them he loves them. what do we get? agravation,more responsibility, and try to suck it up to be strong for the kids. its easy to say keep busy. but its the day to day routine where his absence is felt. i misshim, my kids miss himand i just had to vent

:ventit is a first time deployment for me too. i have 3 girls ages 6,5,and2 and it is hard as hell. right now he is training and we can talk or use the webcam but when he goes overseas i am panicstricken. i have recorded him reading the kids a goodnite story, they each got a build a bear with his voice inside telling them he loves them. what do we get? agravation,more responsibility, and try to suck it up to be strong for the kids. its easy to say keep busy. but its the day to day routine where his absence is felt. i misshim, my kids miss himand i just had to vent

OMG the post about reading the story made me laugh and cry...

Before DH's last TDY he did the same thing, recorded himself reading stories and just talking to the kids. So he leaves and about a week into things I pull out the CD. Both kids COMPLETELY FREAKED OUT!!! Molly (3 at the time) began screaming at the radio, "LET MY DADDY OUT! SAVE HIM MOMMY!" Then she would look at me like I was a monster for not helping get her dad out of the radio. Gabriel (then 5) started crying and couldn't stop. I stoped theplayer and comforted both of them. Later that night I heard vocies from Gabriel's room, when I checked on him he had snuck the CD and was listening to and answering the question DH was asking and then asking DH, "Why won't you talk to me Daddy?" It was the most stressfull night ever.

My advice for a deployment:
Stay positive - Kids feed off you. If you are strong, they will be also.
Stay busy - Forward motion, as long as you are going forward, you won't fall down
Keep him around in your home - Pictures, conversation, talk about him to the kids, make sure they remember who he is.
Take time for yourself - Find a babysitter and go out sometime with your friends

Be strong!

Cat

im n the same boat! ill have a 3 month old !! AND our first deployment.. yikes!!

im confident that itll be okay though!!

Stay busy and find a great support system :hugs

just try and stay busy.