The absolute worst thing you could say on a first date. I got it from a book and it was funny as all get out. Her is how you do it:
I'll start with a line and then the next person follows with a response the follows the main rule something no one would ever say on a first date. Ready here we go.

My biological Clock is ticking.

OK I'll play

"Oh good I have to many kids anyway " lol

Hang up phone and say 'sorry that was my Dr, some of my tests came back positive"

you are gonna give me babies right

Nice to meet you, can I see your bank statement please?

Do you see marriage as a possibility for us? :giggle

So whats your annual salary??

It's been tough, but I've come to accept that most people I date just won't be as smart as I am.

Wow you look just like my ex....

wanna see a pix of my ex-gf/bf??

I hope this doesn't take to long, i have another date in 2 hours

I've been throwing up alllllllllll day. Luckily I feel better now.

(no goodnight kiss for you, buddy...)

well it's a good thing you feel better. i'm still itching like crazy.

The doc says the sores will go away soon. :pukey

How many sexual partners have you had? I bet I got you beat!



"I have never felt better since taking Prozac."

Wow, I think I just saw my big biker husband walk in... you wouldn't mind being a punching bag would you?

Oh shit...I think your girlfriend just walked in. ...OF COURSE I know, I'm her MOTHER!!

My psychologist said that dating might help quiet the voices in my head...

You remind me so much of my mom

"will you be paying for this meal"


:lol

oh by the way i talked to your mom earlier she can't wait to meet me

OMG!! You're so-and-so's brother aren't you?? WOW!! I hope you're better in bed then he was! :P

Oh, excuse me for a sec, need to tape my penis down again, you're just sooo cute!

:lmao :lol

my rash went away

ewwwwwwww...

OMG ladies! We should write a book! Tehehehe! Some of these posts are too funny!! I'm sitting here just cracking up!

Sorry I was late 3 out of the 5 ex-husbands were late picking up the kids.

Don't worry, the doc said its not contagious.

Do you want kids??? I hope not I already have 7 and they all want to meet their New Daddy.

do you want to see my porn collection?

"Wow, that's a nice porn collection. I starred in 7 out of 10 of those!"

i'm almost ready but can you help me shave....my back?

*looking at the trunk of your car* Yeah, I think you will fit.

Wanna fuck....

*smooch* *smooch* OMG! I'm pregnant and your the father!!

(they always say a baby starts with a kiss ;))

Shhh, quiet my folks live here :pukey

those pants look great on you, but they'd look better on my floor.

those pants look great on you, but they'd look better on my floor.
:rofl My brother ACTUALLY said that to a girl in the store! I almost fell out!

NOOO im not engaged, I just really like the ring

Wow, you don't look as fat in that skirt as you normally do.

You looked better on myspace......

(saw that on a shirt)

I fuck sheep and they are better than any woman I have ever had.

The rash has gone away but the itchiness is still there.

I know I have only known you for like five minutes, but I feel like you could be my soulmate.