Texas Women, Kittens and Biscuits
>
>Someone once noted that a Texan can get away with the most awful
>kind of insult just as long as it's prefaced with the
>words, 'Bless her heart' or 'Bless his heart.' As in, 'Bless his
>heart, if they put his brain on the head of a pin, it'd roll
>around like a BB on a 6-lane highway.'
>
>I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was
>telling about her new transplanted northern friend who was upset
>because her toddler is just beginning to talk and he has a Texas
>accent. My friend, who is very kind and, bless her heart, cannot
>do a thing about those thighs of hers, was justifiably miffed
>about this. After all, this woman had CHOSEN to move to Texas a
>couple of years ago.
>
>'Can you believe it?' said her friend, 'A child of mine is going
>to be 'taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss.'
>
>Now, don't get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are from the
>North, bless their hearts. I welcome their perspective, their
>friendships, and their recipes for authentic Northern Italian
>food. I've even gotten past their endless complaints that you
>can't find good bread down here. And the heathens, bless their
>hearts, don't like cornbread!
>
>I have a friend from Bawston, bless her heart, who thinks it's
>hilarious when I say I've got to 'carry' my daughter to the doctor
>or 'cut off' the light. She also gets a giggle every time I
>am 'fixin' to do something. And, bless their hearts, they don't
>even know where 'over yonder' is, or what 'I reckon' means!
>
>My personal favorite was my aunt, saying, 'Bless her heart, she
>cain't help being ugly, but she could'uh stayed home.'
>
>Texas girls know bad manners when they see them:
>1. Drinking straight out of a can.
>2. Not sending thank you notes.
>3. Velvet after February.
>4. White shoes before Memorial Day or after Labor Day.
>
>Texas girls always say:
>1. 'Yes Maam.'
>2. 'Yessir.'
>
>Texas girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:
>1. 'Yawl come back.'
>2. 'Well, bless yer harrt.'
>3. 'Drop by when ya can.'
>4. 'How's yer mama?'
>5. 'Love yer hair.'
>
>Texas girls know their three R's:
>1. Rich
>2. Richer
>3. Richest
>
>Texas girls know everybody's first name:
>1. Hunny
>2. Darlin'
>3. Shuger
>
>Texas girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:
>1. 'Gone With the Wind'
>2. 'Fried Green Tomatoes'
>3. 'Driving Miss Daisy'
>4. 'Steel Magnolias'
>
>Texas girls know the three deadly sins:
>1. Bad hair
>2. Bad manners
>3. Bad blind dates
>
>G.R.I.T. = Girls Raised in Texas !

ROFL...I like that one!!

:lmao@ "authentic Northern Italian food"

i love it. i had to post it on my myspace

:giggle so true! and makes me homesick for "awstun." and tex-mex. and big hair.

lol that is good! I like that one!

that is cute and funny.