Do you think it is okay for someone to keep a hat on at the table?

Does your DH, son, boyfriend, whatever, where one at the table?

If you were with someone at a restaurant would you ask them to take theirs off?

I think it is totally NOT okay.
It is very low class, imo. If I was dating someone who did that, I would ask them to remove it maybe 2x before saying "you have no class, I cannot be with you anymore"

If i was out with friends and someone kept their hat on, I would ask them to remove it.

Do you think it is okay for someone to keep a hat on at the table?

Does your DH, son, boyfriend, whatever, where one at the table?

If you were with someone at a restaurant would you ask them to take theirs off?
No hats at the table.

no hats at the table. if you want wear one to the restaurant because you are going out afterwards fine but take it off when you get to the table

DH doesnt wear hats

DH always takes his off.. I'm assuming out of habit from the Army.. LOL

I do notice people in restaurants with them on .. Doesn't really bother me though

I think it depends on where you are like what kind of restaurant. If it's a top restaurant then no it's not ok. But would it seriously bug me that much where I would tell someone to take it off... no I wouldn't. To me it's just not important enough for me to get upset over it and tell someone I don't know to take it off. Would I wear one no and neither would my DH but to me it's just not that big of a deal. :dunno

Do you think it is okay for someone to keep a hat on at the table?

Does your DH, son, boyfriend, whatever, where one at the table?

If you were with someone at a restaurant would you ask them to take theirs off?


Not if we are in a restaurant. But if were outside at a table in like a lil cafe thing then realy its no big deal unless its totaly not sunny or were in the shade.

not diggin ball caps at tables and think its bad manners to do so. And no way would i let my guys do that!! And yes i would ask them to take it off and if they didnt i would do it for them!

If either of us wear hats, we'll take it off at the table. IF we eat at the galley while he isn't at work, then definitely hats come off.

I don't get bent if I see a stranger wearing their hat at a table. It's their business and not worth ruining my dinner :dunno

To me it's bad manners.. I was always taught that hats are to be taken off when inside.. and definately not left on at the dinner table.

If either of us wear hats, we'll take it off at the table. IF we eat at the galley while he isn't at work, then definitely hats come off.

I don't get bent if I see a stranger wearing their hat at a table. It's their business and not worth ruining my dinner :dunno

i dont mean strangers... I mean if you were with a group and a member of the group. I see strangers do it all the time, do I think they are classless, yeah, but I would never tell them that :lol

i dont mean strangers... I mean if you were with a group and a member of the group. I see strangers do it all the time, do I think they are classless, yeah, but I would never tell them that :lol


OK :lol I'd hate to get my ass beat by some strangers :club

I'd ask someone to remove their hat while at the table with us.

Depends on the type of restaurant we are in. Its rare that my DH wears a ballcap, but when he does, he takes it off if he goes inside ANYWHERE, not just a restaurant. That being said, I see no problem with someone wearing a ballcap in a fast food restaurant or in the mall, etc. Now, if we are in a "real" restaurant and not something fast food type, then yeah, I would hope someone would take off their hat. When my DH takes his off, he always sets it on his knee, never on the table.

dh takes his hat off and sets it on the chair or he sticks it in the back of his pants waistband.

I think it is very inappropriate. My db has never kept it on and I think it bothers him too too see others keep it on.

Depends on the type of restaurant we are in. Its rare that my DH wears a ballcap, but when he does, he takes it off if he goes inside ANYWHERE, not just a restaurant. That being said, I see no problem with someone wearing a ballcap in a fast food restaurant or in the mall, etc. Now, if we are in a "real" restaurant and not something fast food type, then yeah, I would hope someone would take off their hat. When my DH takes his off, he always sets it on his knee, never on the table.

:yes

Sorry about me thinking you meant asking a stranger to take off their cap lol I was like hell no I'm not gonna go up to someone and tell them to take it off. :lol But if it was someone I know and in a place where it shouldn't be worn then yes I would ask them to take it off. :)

:yes

Sorry about me thinking you meant asking a stranger to take off their cap lol I was like hell no I'm not gonna go up to someone and tell them to take it off. :lol But if it was someone I know and in a place where it shouldn't be worn then yes I would ask them to take it off. :)

:lol

I would NEVER go up to a stranger and be like "umm, you need to take that hat off" around here there is probably a shot gun loaded and waiting in their truck!

DB always takes his hat off. I'd probably ask my nephews to as well, if we were someplace having dinner. Probably not DB friends, some of them are morons, but they are grown men, they should know better! You'd think it was a military thing and that they'd all do it but..

:lol

I would NEVER go up to a stranger and be like "umm, you need to take that hat off" around here there is probably a shot gun loaded and waiting in their truck!

I thought you were frikken nuts asking if we would go up to some random person telling them to take off their hat. :lmao People are crazy who knows what they will do. :P

I expect my DH and son to remove their hats (not that DH needs any prompting or reminding - DS still does, though) but would never approach someone else and ask them to do so.

i would never go up to anyone either

I see so many people doing it that I just don't even notice anymore. It's one of those "rules" in society that I've never fully understood. I mean WHY is it rude, other than some old rule that says it is. I just don't get what's so rude about it :neutral

I see so many people doing it that I just don't even notice anymore. It's one of those "rules" in society that I've never fully understood. I mean WHY is it rude, other than some old rule that says it is. I just don't get what's so rude about it :neutral

I agree with this as well. I guess it's just a "rule" that was made awhile ago and now people just assume it to be rude. I personally don't care either way and to me the main reason to take it off would be because other people see it as being rude. Who knows one day this "rule" might change and the cool thing will be to keep the damn thing on. :lol

If we're at a bar, then he doesn't take off his hat. But elsewhere, yes he takes it off. And at the dinner table as well.

I wish whoever made that "hat rule" would have told older men it's not okay to blow their damn noses at the table IN a restaurant too:nutts :shock:tired

oh god........and don't EVEN get me started on how rude I think handkerchiefs ARE!!!

Do you think it is okay for someone to keep a hat on at the table?

Does your DH, son, boyfriend, whatever, where one at the table?

If you were with someone at a restaurant would you ask them to take theirs off?

No, No and yes. :D

It's common table manners. I think the only exception would be at a bar.

I wouldn't walk up to a stranger and ask them to remove their hat, but I would have to wonder, for just a minute, why their mother didn't teach them table manners :giggle

I see so many people doing it that I just don't even notice anymore. It's one of those "rules" in society that I've never fully understood. I mean WHY is it rude, other than some old rule that says it is. I just don't get what's so rude about it :neutral

lol, you think like me sometimes. I guess it's the same for "curse" words. We are told that some words are bad and believe it. They start sounding bad because it's beat into our heads that they are.

I think it'd depend on the type of restaurant. I guess it's ok for a sports bar or fast food place. It's a more comfortable atmosphere. For some upscale restaurant, I guess not because if you're dressed up all nice then I think a hat wouldn't be in the picture anyway.

I know Kevin doesn't wear it at the dinner table, but I can't remember at fast food places or sports bars since we rarely eat inside those types of places. He probably takes it off though. He was taught things like that.

i think it depends on the kind of restaurant that it is. if it's a nicer one then i would not expect people to be wearing hats in there, but to each his own. it certainly would not be my db or my kids (when i have them) doing that. if its a more causal atmosphere i don't really care.

db doesnt even wear hats really so it's not a worry of mine.

no i would not ask anybody to take their hat off. that is their choice, not mine. the only person i would ask to take it off would be my kid if i had one.

No hats at the table.

:yes It is rude IMO

Not in a restaurant, but when we golf and are sitting outside at a table, then its ok with me.

I see so many people doing it that I just don't even notice anymore. It's one of those "rules" in society that I've never fully understood. I mean WHY is it rude, other than some old rule that says it is. I just don't get what's so rude about it :neutral

I have often wondered that myself.

I remove mine the second I step into a building of any kind. Just the programmed part of the military and removing hats indoors.

It doesn't matter to me if someone else wears one! But no, DH nor DS wear them at the table. And I wouldn't ask someone to remove their hat.

I think it is totally NOT okay.
It is very low class, imo. If I was dating someone who did that, I would ask them to remove it maybe 2x before saying "you have no class, I cannot be with you anymore"

If i was out with friends and someone kept their hat on, I would ask them to remove it.

I don't think it really matters. I mean, Matthew doesn't do it because the Navy got him accustomed to NOT doing it. He truly never paid attention to it before. It most certainly is POLITE to take your hat off no matter where you are at the table but I don't think it makes or breaks a person if they don't.

I don't think it's "low class" or means they have no class, I just think in most cases they wereN'T taught to do it so they don't know that some may consider it rude. :dunno

No hats on inside unless he is playing dress up and has on a cowboy, or pirate hat or something along that line. Certainly no hats on at the table.

I don't think it's "low class" or means they have no class, I just think in most cases they wereN'T taught to do it so they don't know that some may consider it rude. :dunno

I think it does if you teach them that it is wrong and they STILL don't give a damn.

To me, if i was witha guy and said "hey, we're at a table take off your hat" in a friendly manner to them, then they should realise that I find it to be terribly rude if they keep it on or do it again.

For me that is just the bare minimum of manners. I think people gravitate towards those who have had similar upbringing, so I don't think I would be with someone in the first place that hadn't really been taught that anyway, kwim?

DB doesn't wear one at the table.. but it doesn't bother me if people do it.. ( well depending on where we are it does alittle...)

No hats at the table.

:yes

I think it does if you teach them that it is wrong and they STILL don't give a damn.

To me, if i was witha guy and said "hey, we're at a table take off your hat" in a friendly manner to them, then they should realise that I find it to be terribly rude if they keep it on or do it again.

For me that is just the bare minimum of manners. I think people gravitate towards those who have had similar upbringing, so I don't think I would be with someone in the first place that hadn't really been taught that anyway, kwim?

True, but they could find it terribly rude for YOU to ask them to take it off too.

Most people DO gravitate towards those with similar values/upbringings but you may be surprised how much opposites attract sometimes. The girl that my BIL just married is NOTHING like how he was brought up. We had Thanksgiving at their place last year and not only did my MIL cook just about the entire meal while she sat on her duff but she also had my MIL in there cleaning up afterwards. I found that incredibly rude and he was not raised that way at all but he picks his battles I guess. Now, my husband & I are on the same page on politeness and how we are going to raise out kids.

I think maybe saying they are disrespectful toward your wishes would be more accurate than calling them "low class".

Well...I guess it doesn't really, because I honestly can't remember if DH does it or not. My best guess is that he takes his off because I have memories of his hat being on his knee. I don't remember where we were, but it is a frequent occurance.

I wear hats when my hair is dirty, and I dont take it off if we go somewhere to eat. Its usually just to IHOP or Sonny's though. I never thought someone would be offended by it. dh takes his off though. :shrug I never noticed before.

Ok first off I love a guy that can pull off the baseball cap look, but there is a time and place for everything.......while, eatting, churches, and durring the anthem are all huge NO NOs!

And hell yeah, I'd even flip it off there darn heads... I mean if they are rude enough to wear it, then I just might be bitchy enough to remove it!

Well I dont understand why its rude, my parents always made my brothers take theirs off at the dinner table growing up. But I dont get it, I think that rule came about when it was a different world you know like when woman only wore dresses and skirts, sex was ONLY after you got married.
With that being said DH doesnt wear one very much at all and neither do my boys.
It does not offend me to see someone wear a hat at the table, its not like they are wearing a ski mask and I cant see their face. If anything its keeping their nasty hairs on their head and not falling in the food :lmao

But I agree to the fact if its a classy place no ...only because it would look silly with dressy clothes.

I see so many people doing it that I just don't even notice anymore. It's one of those "rules" in society that I've never fully understood. I mean WHY is it rude, other than some old rule that says it is. I just don't get what's so rude about it

I agree. Even thinking hard about it, I have trouble recalling if DH takes his hat off or not because it's such a non-issue with me I don't notice at all, appearantly. I'm pretty sure he does take it off because I remember seeing it on his knee at places. I don't want DH to be percieved as rude but other than that, I could care less. I don't think it's rude or bad manners, and don't see why it would be considered so...

But I agree to the fact if its a classy place no ...only because it would look silly with dressy clothes.

People wear cowboy hats with dressy clothes to classy places all the time...

This is a hard one for me to answer & may be a bit of a vent.
The way I was raised it wasn't polite to wear a hat in a restaurant at all. Right now though w/my hair being the way it is & because I have spots that aren't filled in yet, I do wear a hat to restaurants. :confuzzle It's hard because we want to go to a fancy restaurant but we have to wait for me & my hair to get a little longer. :sigh I'm sometimes worrying too much about what others are thinking when I'm eating out w/my husband & I have a hat on that sometimes I find it hard to enjoy my meal. Not always but it happens more when I see other girls wearing things I know I used to wear and aren't now. I will reach my goal one day. It's going to take a lot of work on my part but I want to feel better about myself even more than I do now.

It's so embarassing for me because this isn't the me I know I once was. The old me never wore hats unless I was just having a bad hair day. I want to wear cute clothes and shoes again & hate that I usually wear jeans & t-shirts or tank tops w/shoes or sandals. It didn't used to be this bad until we moved here and we were under a lot of stress. Right now I'm trying to work my way back to looking even more cuter than I was.

Anyway, it doesn't bother me if others wear a hat, except only in nice restaurants/places. I know why I do it & it's b.c. I kind of have to for a while longer. My husband takes his off and I leave mine on. :sigh
I guess what I'm getting at is for the people that automatically assume that others just have no manners... please think about why they may be wearing a hat to begin with. It's not always the obvious.

I guess I don't really have a problem with it, but when I was growing up, you didn't do that. Dh doesn't wear a hat(he has to all day for work, so he hates them outside of work), so it's not really an issue for us. I don't bash people that do wear them, since I don't know why they're wearing them. To a nice restrauant, I would be a bit supprised though if there were a few people wearing ball caps(cowboy hat is a bit different)

I don't mind when other people do it but in our family hats are always off before coming to the dinner table. If we are going out to dinner no hats are worn.

This is a hard one for me to answer & may be a bit of a vent.
The way I was raised it wasn't polite to wear a hat in a restaurant at all. Right now though w/my hair being the way it is & because I have spots that aren't filled in yet, I do wear a hat to restaurants. :confuzzle It's hard because we want to go to a fancy restaurant but we have to wait for me & my hair to get a little longer. :sigh I'm sometimes worrying too much about what others are thinking when I'm eating out w/my husband & I have a hat on that sometimes I find it hard to enjoy my meal. Not always but it happens more when I see other girls wearing things I know I used to wear and aren't now. I will reach my goal one day. It's going to take a lot of work on my part but I want to feel better about myself even more than I do now.

It's so embarassing for me because this isn't the me I know I once was. The old me never wore hats unless I was just having a bad hair day. I want to wear cute clothes and shoes again & hate that I usually wear jeans & t-shirts or tank tops w/shoes or sandals. It didn't used to be this bad until we moved here and we were under a lot of stress. Right now I'm trying to work my way back to looking even more cuter than I was.

Anyway, it doesn't bother me if others wear a hat, except only in nice restaurants/places. I know why I do it & it's b.c. I kind of have to for a while longer. My husband takes his off and I leave mine on. :sigh
I guess what I'm getting at is for the people that automatically assume that others just have no manners... please think about why they may be wearing a hat to begin with. It's not always the obvious.

Oh honey, good grief, I know I personally would not look at you any different for wearing a hat at the table. You just broke my heart with that post! :unlove

When DS get's older, no hat at the table. right now he is small and it is more of a fight then it is worth.

I don't know where the rule came from. I wouldn't approach someone and demand they take it off and give them the "holier then thou" act. That to me is much worse then wearing a hat. That is VERY rude!

This is a hard one for me to answer & may be a bit of a vent.
The way I was raised it wasn't polite to wear a hat in a restaurant at all. Right now though w/my hair being the way it is & because I have spots that aren't filled in yet, I do wear a hat to restaurants. :confuzzle It's hard because we want to go to a fancy restaurant but we have to wait for me & my hair to get a little longer. :sigh I'm sometimes worrying too much about what others are thinking when I'm eating out w/my husband & I have a hat on that sometimes I find it hard to enjoy my meal. Not always but it happens more when I see other girls wearing things I know I used to wear and aren't now. I will reach my goal one day. It's going to take a lot of work on my part but I want to feel better about myself even more than I do now.

It's so embarassing for me because this isn't the me I know I once was. The old me never wore hats unless I was just having a bad hair day. I want to wear cute clothes and shoes again & hate that I usually wear jeans & t-shirts or tank tops w/shoes or sandals. It didn't used to be this bad until we moved here and we were under a lot of stress. Right now I'm trying to work my way back to looking even more cuter than I was.

Anyway, it doesn't bother me if others wear a hat, except only in nice restaurants/places. I know why I do it & it's b.c. I kind of have to for a while longer. My husband takes his off and I leave mine on. :sigh
I guess what I'm getting at is for the people that automatically assume that others just have no manners... please think about why they may be wearing a hat to begin with. It's not always the obvious.

:hugs

another reason I would NEVER tell a stranger that it is rude to where a hat, you just never know.

I doubt you are wearing a filthy camou ball cap like I see around here either...

It depends on where we were. A nice or even decent restaurant, no. But if we're talking about a pub, bar or all-night diner type, i wouldn't care.

DH always takes his off.. I'm assuming out of habit from the Army.. LOL

I do notice people in restaurants with them on .. Doesn't really bother me though

Yeah, Adam takes his off, too. I always assumed it was a military thing. No one in my family wore hats so I wasn't raised with the whole take your hat off at the table thing. I don't think it's that big of a deal. It takes a lot more than just a hat for me to see someone as low class or think they are rude.

I see so many people doing it that I just don't even notice anymore. It's one of those "rules" in society that I've never fully understood. I mean WHY is it rude, other than some old rule that says it is. I just don't get what's so rude about it :neutral

I didn't know either, so I looked it up!!! LOL

The tradition started back in medieval times when knights would return from battle and remove their helmets to show reverence to the king. Then as time went on and hats became a more functional part of society, it was a hygiene issue. Men wore hats at their jobs and would come home with them covered in dirt and gunk, so they would remove them during meals so that they didn't dirty everything up.

Current times aren't the same as back then though, and most hats are not worn for functionality, but for fashion. The taking the hat off at the table (or church, or whatever) is just an old tradition passed on through time even though there is really no need for it now. I have a feeling it will be one of those traditions that eventually just die off as society progresses.

This is a hard one for me to answer & may be a bit of a vent.
The way I was raised it wasn't polite to wear a hat in a restaurant at all. Right now though w/my hair being the way it is & because I have spots that aren't filled in yet, I do wear a hat to restaurants. :confuzzle It's hard because we want to go to a fancy restaurant but we have to wait for me & my hair to get a little longer. :sigh I'm sometimes worrying too much about what others are thinking when I'm eating out w/my husband & I have a hat on that sometimes I find it hard to enjoy my meal. Not always but it happens more when I see other girls wearing things I know I used to wear and aren't now. I will reach my goal one day. It's going to take a lot of work on my part but I want to feel better about myself even more than I do now.

It's so embarassing for me because this isn't the me I know I once was. The old me never wore hats unless I was just having a bad hair day. I want to wear cute clothes and shoes again & hate that I usually wear jeans & t-shirts or tank tops w/shoes or sandals. It didn't used to be this bad until we moved here and we were under a lot of stress. Right now I'm trying to work my way back to looking even more cuter than I was.

Anyway, it doesn't bother me if others wear a hat, except only in nice restaurants/places. I know why I do it & it's b.c. I kind of have to for a while longer. My husband takes his off and I leave mine on. :sigh
I guess what I'm getting at is for the people that automatically assume that others just have no manners... please think about why they may be wearing a hat to begin with. It's not always the obvious.

First of all :hugs . I quoted you because I thought of something very similar when reading this thread. I have an uncle who was seriously injured when he was 8 years old. He was hit by a drunk driver and has a lot of missing hair and scarring on his head from it. He ALWAYS wears a hat unless he is at home to cover up the scars. First of all, he is embarrassed by them. And second of all, he doesn't want people to be grossed out by them. I really hope that no one has ever treated him badly for wearing his hat in public all the time.

I think it is rude and tacky and would tell my DH and DS to take theres off...It doesn't really bother me when other people do it..but it does when my family does.

:hugs

another reason I would NEVER tell a stranger that it is rude to where a hat, you just never know.

I doubt you are wearing a filthy camou ball cap like I see around here either...

Thanks. That made me smile and feel better. :hugs :wink No, the hat I have is a kakhi ball cap that just tastefully has the j.crew logo on the front of it in Navy blue lettering. My husband's mom got it for me a few years ago just to have for whenever but when my hair situation was getting worse I tended to wear it more and more. Now it's whenever I go out. Thank you also Wicked and ChewiesBabyDoll for your thoughts as well. :)

I really feel like I need to be honest with eveyone on what I personally am going through now. I'm really trying to fight this thing. I'll have it the rest of my life but it had never gotten to be this bad. I'm not looking for pity from people, I am just in need of some support every now and then. So, thanks for listening everyone and for all your support. With our pending orders and a bunch of other small things going on I do need some support right now. Therapy is helping and my new anxiety med I went on too.

Sometimes if Joshua is massaging me or we're just laying in bed talking before falling asleep he'll lean over and kiss my head and say, "I'm so proud of you...you're really coming along and making a lot of progress. I'm always here for you, always." :wub He has been so helpful/supportive since the day we met when we were 15. I love him w/all my heart and even when he's at sea I tell myself what he says to me when he is home and that gives me strength to keep up with my goals.

Just for the hell of it sometime soon (we've been busy and our photos are organized but not all the digital ones are) I want to post some pics from our wedding, when we were dating and now so you guys can see me/us. :)

hmm df used to do that and i would force him to take it off. now thanks to the army no more hats at the table or inside...thank god....